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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇷🇴 has viewed:

If you like pointing out beautiful scenery to three people who are on their phones, a family road trip is for you.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has downloaded:

I only attract psychopaths. If you’ve ever had a crush on me, find a therapist.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has copied:

Every citizen over 18 should be eligible to be drafted into the Postal Service.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has copied:

Sorry to interrupt your scrolling, but I hope life gets better for you.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has downloaded:

If you call me “daddy” in bed, I will immediately stop what we are doing and make you clean your room.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has bookmarked:

Winter. You get up, drink coffee and then it gets dark.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has bookmarked:

Me waking up: wow, I can’t wait to go to sleep tonight.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has shared:

I am half agony, half hope.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has bookmarked:

Grocery shopping before Christmas is a nightmare. My milk expired while I was waiting in line.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has viewed:

Adding lol to things is good feng shui.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 19, 2026

Users Online

3,558

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Slack:

Have you ever apologized to your car after you hit a pothole?

Spotted on Pinterest:

Just came back from my walk, and I was right about everything.

Broadcasted on YouTube:

Check yourself before you Shrek yourself.

Shared recently on TikTok:

The way I forget stuff at my age, I just know it is over for me after 50.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Group projects taught me how to do everything alone and trust no one.

Live now on LinkedIn:

Always remember, if you ever need me, I’m just several phone calls and unread texts away.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

My worst fear is dating someone who loves their ex like my exes love me.

Trending via Instagram:

I’ve learned my lesson so many times that I could be a teacher.

Breaking via Snapchat:

In case you wanna quit vaping, I’d suggest using a harmonica.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

You think you’re aging well and then you feel an earlobe hair blowing in the wind.

60 Funny meet quotes

Funny meet quotes 🤣 are the perfect way to break the ice when you bump into someone unexpectedly! Whether you’re meeting a friend, a colleague, or a stranger 🧐, a humorous quote can lighten the mood and spark a laugh. They’re ideal for sharing on social media 📱, adding a touch of humor to your day. So next time you’re caught in an awkward encounter, have a funny quote ready to make it memorable! 😂

New funny meet quotes 👇

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All funny meet quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections
✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

75 shares on WeChat this month:

Text a co-worker at a random time “are you joining this meeting?” as a fun holiday prank.

35 shares on YouTube this month:

Men be like, “But I’m different.” Yeah, a different type of disappointment.

46 shares on Facebook this month:

My wife and I are going to quit our jobs and travel until we run out of money. I estimate we’ll be home around 9 p.m. tonight.

46 shares on LinkedIn this month:

IKEA assembly instructions should come with a glossary of Swedish swear words.

53 shares on Reddit this month:

Wild Friday night, and by wild, I mean me and the other psychopaths at the gym.

96 shares on Threads this month:

Only a fool would use the toothbrush the dentist gives you. You think the dentist would freely hand you the tools that would keep them away?

53 shares on YouTube this month:

At the end of the day, it’s the friend that doesn’t take your ghosting phases personally.

47 shares on WhatsApp this month:

When someone asks me what my dream job is, it’s just like “I don’t know dude, I don’t dream about jobs”

64 shares on Snapchat this month:

It’s important to listen to both sides of the debate because you need to hear both the reality of the situation and also the dumbest thing anyone’s ever said.

72 shares on Threads this month:

The cynicism of those who urge me not to do what I can to help the Nigerian royal family.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

21 folks are currently checking 👀

The lion doesn’t concern itself with the contents of your prior email.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

The reason my eyes are dilated is because I am so attracted to you, officer.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Drugs don’t ruin lives. Drug tests do.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

My nutritionist told me wine doesn’t count as a fruit source so now I need to find a different nutritionist.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Vote for me and I’ll remove all the calories from cheese.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

They say we learn from our mistakes. That’s why I’m making as many as possible… I’ll be a genius soon.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

People will say stuff like “Well, at least if WWIII happens, I won’t have to go to work…” I think in your heart you know that’s not true.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

You can add “cha cha cha” to any sentence you want without explaining yourself. Nobody really appreciates this.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Ex’s be like “I gave you everything”. Yeah, trust issues.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

It takes a lot of balls to golf the way I do.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 19, 2026

Users Online

3,698

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇹 has copied:

I enjoy driving because it combines my desire to sit with my talent for being angry.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has copied:

My gf doesn’t really like it when I talk about my ex, which means I now have a lot of stories from college where I’m just alone for some reason.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has viewed:

Maybe the reason we weren’t that affected by all the violence we saw in cartoons as kids is because it was offset by classical music.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has bookmarked:

The date didn’t go well but she was nice enough to send a PDF of everything I did wrong afterwards.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has downloaded:

Have kids so you can fully appreciate how well your dog listens.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has bookmarked:

Called in, “Let’s make this simple. What excuse haven’t I used yet?”

Someone from 🇧🇴 has bookmarked:

Don’t worry password, I’m insecure too.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has viewed:

In an alternate universe, sex dreams of me.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has shared:

The way turkeys feel about November is probably how treadmills feel about January.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has downloaded:

My hair would never allow me to commit a crime. I really do leave my DNA everywhere.

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

Achieving AGI by reducing the intelligence of the average human rather than increasing the intelligence of AI.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

I want someone who will look at me the same way I look at chocolate cake.

Trending via Twitch:

Single introverts be like, “If it’s meant to be, my future love will simply teleport into my living room.”

Spreading quickly via Pinterest:

Ancient Egyptians used to worship cats and write on walls, a practice we still continue to do today on the Internet.

Making waves on Messenger:

Nobody stresses a woman out more than a man who isn’t her man yet.

Just shared via WeChat:

It’s important to post stupid stuff so you can learn who likes you.

Making waves on Threads:

If you love someone be brave enough to tell them. Otherwise be brave enough to watch them dating someone else.

Shared recently on YouTube:

My wallet is like an onion; opening it makes me cry.

Just landed via Slack:

If Halloween is over, then why am I still scared?

Making waves on Reddit:

I automatically assume everyone finds me unattractive until they tell me otherwise, and then I assume that they are lying to make fun of me.

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