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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇪 has viewed:

“But it’s summer,” is going to be my excuse for everything from now until the end of September.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has viewed:

I’m having a garage sale and hope people I’ve borrowed things from don’t come.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has shared:

What did parents do before smart phones, hold their babies with two hands or something?

Someone from 🇿🇲 has copied:

Explain it to me like I’m five then do it for me like I’m one hundred.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has copied:

Establish dominance over your cat by suddenly bolting out of the room for no reason.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has shared:

My family was too poor for a gene pool, so we soaked our genes in rye whiskey.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has shared:

Introducing WifeChat™, the app where you talk to your wife.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has shared:

Perks of being ugly: phone battery lasts longer.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has shared:

Confuse your doctor by putting on rubber gloves while he does.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has viewed:

Fake laughing with customers is actually a job skill.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

791 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,953

Funny Quotes Topics

13,925

Funny Quotes Images

10,953

5 minutes ago

3,427

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Reddit:

Last night my guardian angel came to me, covered me up, gave me a kiss on the forehead and whispered in my ear: “You’re a pain in the ass!”

Just landed via Telegram:

8 planets, 204 countries, thousands of islands, 7 seas, 8 billion people, and I’m single.

Going viral on TikTok:

I got one brain cell left and it moves around my head like a Windows screensaver.

Making waves on Snapchat:

A clever man fills his wife’s closet with so many clothes that no other man can fit in.

Live now on TikTok:

Happy return of “yes of course it’s bedtime, see how dark it is outside” to all parents who celebrate.

Going viral on YouTube:

Not to brag, but I ate all of my bananas before they turned brown. Don’t be jealous.

Live now on Threads:

Are you my appendix? Cause you seem kind of useless to me.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

I can always tell what part of my cycle I’m in by how concerned my friends are over my Tweets.

Shared recently on Discord:

Almost fell asleep while putting on the sweater because it got dark for a moment. That’s all you need to know about my morning state.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

My morning routine includes 10 minutes of sitting on my bed and thinking about how tired I am.

Home » Funny Self-deprecating Quotes

92 Funny self-deprecating quotes

Funny self-deprecating quotes 🤦‍♂️😂 are the secret sauce to celebrating our delightful imperfections with a chuckle. Perfect for those moments when you’re staring at a minor mishap and thinking, “Did I really just do that?” 🙈 Whether you’re laughing at your culinary disasters or your unmatched ability to trip over nothing, these gems remind us that life’s too short to take ourselves too seriously. So, embrace the chaos and giggle through the glorious messiness of being perfectly flawed! 🎉😜

New funny self-deprecating quotes 👇

5 days ago
Share →: I think God was high when he made me.

Commentary:
Sounds like the divine was feeling extra creative that day! 🌈😂✨
5 days ago
Share →: Gatekeeping how insanely handsome I am by looking like total shit all the time.

Commentary:
Keeping it low-key by blending in with the potato squad! 🥔✨
5 days ago
Share →: “You don’t look 40.” How am I supposed to look?

Commentary:
Not sure, but apparently, I need a manual and some face stickers! 👀🎨🤣
5 days ago
Share →: If I were a category, I’d be “miscellaneous.”

Commentary:
When you don't quite fit anywhere but somehow fit everywhere 🤪🤷‍♂️ #TeamMiscellaneous
6 days ago
Share →: Sometimes I do random acts of kindness, like keeping my mouth shut, for example.

Commentary:
Silence: the greatest gift, and it's budget-friendly too! 😂🤐✨
6 days ago
Share →: Making a record-breaking number of bad choices today, I’m really proud of myself.

Commentary:
Congratulations on your new personal best in decision-making Olympics! 🏆🤪🎉
6 days ago
Share →: My signature move is me looking for my phone that I’m currently holding in my hand.

Commentary:
Story of my life—it's a real skill losing things while still holding them! 🙈📱🕵️‍♂️
7 days ago
Share →: I have many talents, all equally un-monetizable.

Commentary:
When your talents are priceless, but your bank account wishes they weren't 😂💸 #SkillzForDays
7 days ago
Share →: Not to brag, but I can put my socks on without sitting down.

Commentary:
Just wait until you see my advanced level: putting them on while hopping on one foot! 🧦🦘😂
7 days ago
Share →: I love being a pretty woman because it widens the threshold for cringe-worthy things I can say.

Commentary:
Being a pretty woman is like having a golden ticket to the cringe Olympics! 😂🎟️💃

For even more funny self-deprecating quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny self-deprecating quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

791 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,953

Funny Quotes Topics

13,925

Funny Quotes Images

10,953

5 minutes ago

3,425

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇦 has shared:

Turns out I’m not an afternoon person either.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has downloaded:

Did you get the telepathic message I sent earlier?

Someone from 🇨🇻 has copied:

I know it hurts like hell, and you don’t think you can do it, but it’s just one push-up.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has viewed:

I will never forget how to spell bananas, thanks to Gwen Stefani.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has shared:

If you’re wondering whether something is A.I. or not, A.I. has already won.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has shared:

I believe my ex-wife is days away from having a nuclear weapon.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has shared:

That feeling when it’s Friday, you blink once, and somehow it’s Monday again.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has copied:

Dear God, make me a bird so I can fly. Fly far, far away and also so I can poop on people.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has bookmarked:

College is not even mentioned once in the Bible. Somebody get me outta here.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has viewed:

Don’t let the British accent fool you. I’m not saying anything smart.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on WeChat:

I love how these vegans still drink water. That’s a fish’s house!

Spotted on LinkedIn:

I don’t normally like to brag about expensive trips but I just got back from the grocery store.

Seen just now on X:

Some people stay longer in a toilet than in a relationship.

Reported on Threads:

Time travel is all well and good, but I feel so stupid right now. None of them have the mustache. No way to tell which baby is Hitler.

Breaking via Pinterest:

Changing my relationship status from “Single” to “I give up.”

Trending via Facebook:

My attempts to purge my possessions always seem to result in me rediscovering that I have lots of nice things, after which I lie happily on my hoard like a dragon.

Shared recently on TikTok:

A hacker called me and said he had all my passwords. I got a pen and paper and said ‘Thank God for that, what are they?’

Making waves on TikTok:

The marriage rate has been trending downward. Choreographed wedding dances may be the reason.

Trending via Discord:

My love language is being sent money.

Just shared via Threads:

I’m at that age where someone can call me the wrong name and I’m just like “whatever, I’ll be Dan for a minute”.

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