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71 Funny sure quotes

Not sure if “life hack” exactly, but I fell down the stairs and now my whole family is being so nice and catering to my needs.

3 months ago

Sure, my internet service is overpriced and spotty but you can’t put a price on unintentionally being dropped from every Zoom meeting.

3 months ago

Whoever came up with “penny for your thoughts,” “don’t nickel and dime me,” and “another day another dollar” sure knew how to coin a phrase.

3 months ago

I’m not sure what everyone at my coworking space does for work, but I’m pretty sure one guy’s job is chewing.

3 months ago

There should be a socially acceptable way to say, “I’m not sure what to say to that. Can you please say something different?”.

3 months ago

Pretty sure the best place to hide a dead body is in a new tab you opened to read later.

3 months ago

As a sales clerk, you want to shout after some people as they leave the store: “Are you sure you’ve really REALLY touched everything?”

3 months ago

I think the bowl of ice cream I ate earlier gave me a stomach ache, so I ate a another bowl to make sure.

3 months ago

When I was a kid there were two sure ways to die, natural causes and talking back to your parents.

3 months ago

I’m pretty sure by now that we’re some kind of satire channel on some other planet.

3 months ago

My doctor told me to eat more Taco Bell. Well, he actually said “less McDonald’s”, but I’m pretty sure I know what he meant.

3 months ago

My husband sure has a lot of opinions on which movie he’s gonna sleep through.

3 months ago

If you ever ask a teen to do something and they just say “sure” without arguing, check that they haven’t been replaced with an android.

3 months ago

Sometimes I’m out in public and I have to look down real quick to make sure I remembered to put on pants.

3 months ago

If you think I’m annoying, give it some time. You’ll know for sure pretty soon.

3 months ago

Just saw my evil doppelganger speed away in a DeLorean. I’m sure it’s fine.

3 months ago

At this point, I’m sure I’ll meet an alien or zombies before I meet the love of my life!

3 months ago

Toothpaste sure knows how to ruin whatever you’re drinking.

3 months ago

If you play guitar in a band, always make sure to look like it hurts to play.

3 months ago

Single, not sure how to mingle.

3 months ago