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45 Funny us quotes

Netflix should’ve just maybe mailed us all this fight on DVD.

Netflix should’ve just maybe mailed us all this fight on DVD.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025
I voted for the candidate on the last yard sign I saw before pulling in. Slow children at play will lead us into the future.

I voted for the candidate on the last yard sign I saw before pulling in. Slow children at play will lead us into the future.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025
Elections make you feel like we're all in divorce court waiting to see who gets custody of us.

Elections make you feel like we’re all in divorce court waiting to see who gets custody of us.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025
Lord, they down here giving us bills every month after you already paid the price.

Lord, they down here giving us bills every month after you already paid the price.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025
Political ads be like: send us money so we can send you more ads.

Political ads be like: send us money so we can send you more ads.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025
The great thing about having pet insurance is that while our dachshund is at the vets, they've given us a courtesy poodle to hang out with.

The great thing about having pet insurance is that while our dachshund is at the vets, they’ve given us a courtesy poodle to hang out with.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025
The train announcer just said we should keep our personal belongings with us at all times but I've left most of mine at home.

The train announcer just said we should keep our personal belongings with us at all times but I’ve left most of mine at home.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025
Can’t stop thinking about that time at the planetarium where they showed us a picture of earth and everyone booed.

Can’t stop thinking about that time at the planetarium where they showed us a picture of earth and everyone booed.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025
We went out on a boat to see whales and the crew encouraged us to clap and cheer for the whales and boo at the regular fish.

We went out on a boat to see whales and the crew encouraged us to clap and cheer for the whales and boo at the regular fish.

Funny Quotes Jan 26, 2025
Aubrey Plaza is like an alien who went to earth to study us but accidentally got famous and can't leave.

Aubrey Plaza is like an alien who went to earth to study us but accidentally got famous and can’t leave.

Funny Quotes Jan 26, 2025