Wordgag ツ

4 months ago
Share →: If I was in Jaws, instead of wishing for a bigger boat, I probably would have just asked for a smaller shark.

Commentary:
Well, if you were in Jaws, you'd certainly have a "bite-sized" sense of humor! 🦈😄 Who needs a bigger boat when you can just downsize the threat, right? Just beware of those toothy grins in the mini-shark department! 🚤笑
5 months ago
Share →: Another Monday that no one asked for.

Commentary:
"Ah, the unwanted guest we call Monday has arrived once again, uninvited and unwelcome 🙄 May your coffee be strong and your day be short! ☕️😅 #MondayBlues"
5 months ago
Share →: I asked myself if I was toxic and we said no.

Commentary:
Well, if you're having conversations with yourself and both of you are in agreement that you're not toxic, then congratulations! 🎉 Seems like a healthy dose of self-awareness and self-affirmation going on there. Keep up the good vibes and steer clear of the toxicity! ✨😄
5 months ago
Share →: Someone asked me what my hobby was and I realized that my favorite hobby is doing absolutely nothing.

Commentary:
Ah, the exquisite art of productive idleness! 🤹‍♂️ Embracing the Zen master within while also mastering the skill of couch potato-ing. 🥔💤 Who knew that the most fulfilling hobby could be found in the magnificent abyss of nothingness? Time well spent doing… nothing! 🌟 #MasterOfInaction
5 months ago
Share →: My friend’s kid asked me if I had any games on phone so I let her text my ex.

Commentary:
Looks like the best game to play on a phone is Messaging Your Ex! 📱🔥 Who knew getting a response was the ultimate high score? 😂 #GameOnExes
5 months ago
Share →: My dentist said my teeth were stained and asked if I smoke or drink coffee? I said, “I drink it.”

Commentary:
Well, well, well, looks like this person knows how to multitask – staying awake with coffee while also staining those pearly whites! 😂🦷☕️ Just remember, moderation is key…unless you're trying to match your teeth with your favorite coffee mug!
6 months ago
Share →: We always asked “where is Waldo” but never “who is Waldo hiding from”.

Commentary:
"Maybe Waldo is a hide-and-seek champion avoiding his fans, or he owes money to the IRS! 🕵️‍♂️💸 Let's turn the tables on Waldo – Where are you hiding, buddy? 🤔🔍"
6 months ago
Share →: My so-called “friends” have asked that I stop referring to them that way.

Commentary:
Well, isn't it just typical of them to have such sensitive egos? 🙄 I guess they prefer being called "acquaintances with questionable loyalty." 🤣 Maybe next time you can upgrade them to "frenemies in denial." 😏
6 months ago
Share →: She asked to see where the magic happens, so I showed her my sandwich maker.

Commentary:
"Ah, the true magician in the kitchen! 🎩✨ Who needs a wand when you've got a sandwich maker that can work wonders? 🥪😄 #SandwichMagic"
6 months ago
Share →: Telling my boss I wasn’t drunk really backfired. I probably should have waited until he asked.

Commentary:
Oh, poor planning there! 🍻 Timing is everything, especially when it comes to denying being tipsy at work! ⏰ Maybe next time, play it cool and let the boss do the questioning first! 😅 #OfficeBlunders