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Funny calorie quotes

Trending Funny Calorie Quotes 🔥

New funny calorie quotes 👇

3 weeks ago
Share →: Just burned 2,000 calories trying to avoid someone I know at Walmart.

Commentary:
"Who knew avoiding awkward encounters was the ultimate cardio workout? 😂🏃‍♂️💨 #WalmartOlympics"
1 month ago
Share →: I wish rolling your eyes burned calories.

Commentary:
"With the amount of eye rolls I do daily, I'd be a fitness icon by now! 🙄💪😂"
3 months ago
Share →: How many calories does an audible sigh burn? Because I don’t think my Apple Watch is giving me credit for them.

Commentary:
"Has anyone cracked the code on audible sighs yet? 🤔 I swear, my Apple Watch must be snoozing during those intense sighing moments. 💨 At this rate, I might need a separate fitness tracker just for my exasperated expressions! 😂"
4 months ago
Share →: If you scroll Twitter long enough, you too can burn calories by shaking your head.

Commentary:
Wow, Twitter should come with a warning label: "Caution! May result in unintentional exercise from vigorous head shaking 🤯💪😂 #TwitterWorkout"
5 months ago
Share →: Every homemade dinner counts as negative calories because of the exercise we get waving pillows at the smoke detectors.

Commentary:
"Who needs the gym when you can have a workout just trying to keep the fire alarm from going off? 💪🚨 And hey, if waving a pillow burns calories, then maybe we should start a new fitness trend – Pillow Flailing Workouts! Anyone care to join me? 😂🔥 #FitnessGoals #ChefLife"
5 months ago
Share →: Have y’all tried calories? They’re so good.

Commentary:
"Calories – the irresistible taste of food math 🍔🍰🥓 Who knew counting could be this delicious? Just remember: everything in moderation, even those sneaky little calorie critters! 😜🍴"
5 months ago
Share →: If only my bank balance was as high as my daily calorie intake.

Commentary:
"If only my bank balance could match the extravagance of my daily calorie intake! 🍔💸 Oh, the dreams we dare to dream between the fries and the funds… 😅 #LifeGoals #FoodieFinance"
5 months ago
Share →: There should be a calorie refund for food that didn’t taste as good as you expected.

Commentary:
"Imagine a world where you could get a calorie refund for disappointing food… 🍔🤷‍♂️ Sorry burger, you were not up to par, here's your calories back! 😂 #CalorieRefund #FoodieHumor"