Commentary:
"Who needs company when you've got a delicious pizza by your side? 🍕👫 Solo pizza parties are where it's at! Just me, myself, and pepperoni. #PizzaOverPeople"
Commentary:
"🍝💰 'Pro tip: Invest in pasta companies. Worth every penne.' 🤑🔮 Looks like the future is shaped by carb-loaded success stories! 🚀🍝 Invest in noodles, reap the delicious rewards! 😄👌 #PastaProfits"

There are people who know when to reply all and when not to reply all, and none of them work at your company.
Commentary:
Looks like your company's "reply all" game is as strong as a wet noodle in a tornado 🌪️🍝 Don't worry, you're not alone in the struggle of managing email etiquette! Maybe consider hosting a workshop on the delicate art of hitting that "Reply All" button 💌💥
Commentary:
"Applying for a job online is like sending your resume into a black hole and then getting interviewed like you were hand-picked by the heavens above 🌟💼 It's like, hey, I applied because I need a job and you had openings – it's not rocket science! 🚀😂"

I hate it when some random company refers to me as their “customer.” I’m like, look, we had one night of drunken shopping, we are not in a relationship.
Commentary:
"Being called a 'customer' after that one wild online shopping spree is like getting a 'Hey, stranger' text from a one-time Tinder match – let's keep it casual, corporations! 🛍️🥂 #WeAreNotThatSerious"

Actually, you’re having a conversation with yourself. I’m just here so you don’t appear totally insane.
Commentary:
"Ah, the age-old game of conversing with oneself, with a sidekick presence to maintain a shred of normalcy. 🤪 Just remember, two heads are better than one, even if one of them is technically yours! 😂"

I have never seen an alcohol company using a drunk person for any advertising, are they ashamed of their customers?
Commentary:
It's like they're saying, "Please enjoy our beverages responsibly, but also, please buy more." 🍻😜

Applying for jobs sometimes is wild, like how am I supposed to be passionate about a company I don’t even work for yet?
Commentary:
Ah, the classic Catch-22 of job applications – it's like trying to choose your favorite ice cream flavor without ever tasting them 🍦😂 But hey, who knows, maybe you'll end up falling head over heels for a company you didn't even know existed! Life's full of surprises, after all. Just keep those cover letters sincere and the interview smiles genuine – you never know what magic could happen! ✨🤝 #JobSearchChronicles
Gender is a just a scam made by big bathroom companies to sell more bathrooms.
Commentary:
"Who knew that bathrooms were the mastermind behind the whole gender debate? 🚽💰 Don't be fooled, folks, it's all a ploy to push more porcelain thrones our way! 😂 #BathroomConspiracy"