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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇰 has bookmarked:

How my weekend was? Light, dark, light, dark, Monday.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has bookmarked:

I hate how everything is organic now. I miss chemicals.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has viewed:

Getting so tangled in the sex shop bead curtain that they have to put me down like a horse with a broken leg.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has bookmarked:

Person in murder documentary: This is a small town. Things like this don’t happen here. Me: Um, based on the shows I watch, that’s all that happens in small towns.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has shared:

Wearing white pants today, so it’s really just a matter of time before I spill something on myself.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has copied:

Squirrels get most of their energy from chewing on powerlines, that acorn thing is just for show.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has shared:

I haven’t been with anyone in 3 years. I feel sorry for my next boyfriend. He might not make it through the day.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has bookmarked:

Fruit and vegetables expire faster when you’re the one paying for them.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has copied:

Girl, you gotta try this healing potion. It’s called beer.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has downloaded:

People drive you insane and then say “see, I told you that you’re insane.”

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

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Funny Quotes Total

15,752

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17,765

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15,752

Updated

Jan 20, 2026

Users Online

3,388

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on LinkedIn:

Trust me; this is the second millennium I’ve lived in.

Just shared via Twitch:

The light at the end of the tunnel is only the headlight of the oncoming train.

Just shared via Twitch:

I was abducted by aliens. They made me wash my hands, clean my room, and eat my vegetables. Turns out I was on the mothership.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

You know you’re getting older when you keep asking “Why do they have to make the instructions so small?”

Spotted on Twitch:

The theory that two stacked beds can’t be converted into two regular beds has been debunked.

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

I need to move to New York and be miserable. I think it’d be so good for me.

Freshly posted on Slack:

Hold on, I just need to take off my glasses and put my face in my hands about it first.

Trending via Discord:

I hope nobody sees me eating by myself and feels sorry for me. I’m having the time of my life.

Going viral on Instagram:

That sound when you close the cupboard and hear something fall inside, that’s the sound of somebody else’s problem.

Shared recently on Discord:

I have high standards for dating because I’m a high-quality woman, and you wouldn’t want me any other way.

64 Funny coping quotes

More funny coping quotes 👇

The subtle art of surviving this life with grace and dignity.

2 months ago

art, coping, dignity, grace, humor, life, positivity, survival, wit
Holding it together with duct tape and sarcasm.

2 months ago

coping, duct, duct tape, holding, humor, laughter, life, life struggles, resilience, sarcasm, struggles, tape, together, wit
Due to personal reasons, I’ll be using humor to hide pain.

2 months ago

comedy, coping, disguise, due, emotions, hide, humor, laughter, pain, personal, personal reasons, reasons
Sometimes you just gotta say LOL and move on.

2 months ago

coping, humor, just, laughter, lesson, life, life lesson, lightheartedness, lol, move, move on, positivity, say, sometimes
Being gracefully insane is the only way to survive life’s daily bullshit.

2 months ago

attitude, being, bullshit, coping, daily, daily life, grace, gracefully, humor, insane, insanity, life, life struggles, only, struggles, survival, survive
What substance do I have to abuse to stop yearning?

2 months ago

abuse, addiction, coping, desire, humor, i, longing, stop, substance, yearning
Deciding if I should heal or just give up and go completely insane.

2 months ago

choices, coping, decision, give, give up, heal, health, humor, i, insane, just, mental, mental health, should, struggle
Who needs therapy when you can gaslight yourself into thinking that everything is fine?

2 months ago

coping, everything, fine, gaslight, health, humor, irony, mental, mental health, needs, self, therapy, thinking, yourself
Kinda lame that pretending everything is fine isn’t working.

2 months ago

coping, everything, fine, humor, lame, pretending, reality, working
Feeling melancholy. Think I’ll have a drink and make things much worse.

2 months ago

alcohol, coping, drink, feeling, humor, irony, melancholy, much, self-deprecation, things, think, worse

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All funny coping quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

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Social Media Stars ⭐

78 shares on X this month:

My Wi-Fi is stronger than my will to socialize.

92 shares on LinkedIn this month:

There are two types of people at work: Those who work and those who have become pros at looking busy.

86 shares on Threads this month:

If you are lonely, dim all the lights and put on a horror movie. You won’t feel like you are lonely any more.

91 shares on Threads this month:

I don’t need all of these heat advisory warnings on my phone. I’ve been outside. I have skin. I know.

53 shares on Pinterest this month:

Anyone want to fall in love and split rent?

22 shares on Instagram this month:

Chill, folks, it’s just a simulation.

48 shares on Threads this month:

If I wore a mood ring, it would probably explode immediately.

48 shares on Slack this month:

Do I work hard? No. But do I work smart to compensate. Absolutely not.

42 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I’m going to start walking around in my yard all day in a bathrobe so my neighbors will build that privacy fence I always wanted.

85 shares on Twitch this month:

Welcome to your 40s, the best part of your day is now the heated seats in your car after a long day.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇰 has viewed:

I just come here for the free life advice and inspirational quotes from people who’s lives are complete train wrecks.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has downloaded:

When there’s food around, our cat is like an adorable, fluffy shark circling round.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has shared:

If there’s no open mouth cougher on the plane they hold the flight until they can find one.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has bookmarked:

I put the ‘no’ in ‘I will let u know’.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has copied:

I refuse to take a single bite of my food until I find something good on TV.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has bookmarked:

Beavers are also just otters that have learned carpentry.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has shared:

Awkwardly stares into the abyss in between meetings.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has downloaded:

“November Rain” is just 9 minutes of me realizing I’m too dramatic to date someone with healthy coping skills.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has viewed:

You’re in her DMs. I’m accidentally reposting reels of Tibetan foxes because I don’t know how to use the app anymore.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has shared:

Lord, remove any laziness from my body and push me to my full potential the rest of this year.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on WhatsApp:

Unfortunately, I do enjoy watching the downfall of people who did me wrong.

Breaking via Snapchat:

Anti-capitalism is just code for “I don’t know how anything works.”

Going bananas on Snapchat:

Nostalgia is mostly dumb nonsense, but movie rental stores were legitimately better than streaming.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

“Are you getting your period?” God forbid I’m just evil.

Just landed via Messenger:

One time, I was so high my bra unclasped, and I thought I got shot.

Spreading quickly via Telegram:

Is it better to beat someone to the punch or punch someone to the beat?

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

According to autocorrect, my favorite Star Wars character is Bob’s Feet.

Going bananas on X:

Ever think vampires just lied about hating garlic, now we’re just out here seasoning ourselves for them?

Making waves on WeChat:

I would like you to meet my significant other. Her name is Cheese.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

Some people call me crazy. I prefer the term happy with a twist.

Activity Log ✨

64 Funny coping quotes

More funny coping quotes 👇

All funny coping quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

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Activity Log ✨