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82 Funny friend quotes

Trending Funny Friend Quotes 🔥

Hello bedtime my old friend, my brain is laughing once again.
Bison may look friend-shaped, but they already have all the friends they want. Keep your distance and don’t make it awkward.
A colon can completely change the meaning of a sentence. For example: Jill ate her friend’s sandwich VS Jill ate her friend’s colon.
Messed up and threw a surprise party for my minimalist friend. Now 25 of us are hiding behind the granite orb.
My friend’s kid asked me if I had any games on phone so I let her text my ex.

More funny friend quotes 👇

3 months ago
Share →: My Facebook friends are like my pen collection. I have 100 but only one writes.

Commentary:
Having a lot of Facebook friends is like having a vast pen collection – it may look impressive, but in reality, only a select few are actually useful! Just like how only one pen writes, only a handful of friends truly engage and interact with you online. Quality over quantity, right?
3 months ago
Share →: Our phones fall, we panic. Our friends fall, we laugh.

Commentary:
"Our phones may be replaceable, but friendship… well, that's a bit harder to upgrade. Just make sure your friends know how to do a graceful tumble for maximum comedic effect!"
3 months ago
Share →: Having a pool is so neat. All of your friends are suddenly interested to catch up on the hottest days of the year.

Commentary:
"Owning a pool is like becoming the ultimate social magnet – nothing screams popularity quite like being the source of cool refreshment on scorching days. Who knew a few gallons of water could make you the hottest host in town?"
3 months ago
Share →: Every girl keeps an extra boyfriend and calls him ‘best friend’.

Commentary:
Ah, the age-old tactic of disguising an extra boyfriend as a best friend – a cunning strategy indeed! It's like having a backup plan with benefits. Just make sure your best friend doesn't accidentally receive any love notes meant for your boyfriend!
4 months ago
Share →: I am a friend to all cats. Yes, even the mean ones. They have their reasons.

Commentary:
"Embracing the cattitude! 😼 Even the feline grumps deserve love. Perhaps they were just having a 'purrsonal' bad day! 🐾😹 #CatLover"
4 months ago
Share →: The three people who like every single one of my posts are going in my will.

Commentary:
Looks like those three people have secured their spots in the will by diligently hitting that "like" button! Who knew that social media engagement could have such high stakes? Better keep an eye on those notifications, you never know when your inheritance might be at stake!
4 months ago
Share →: A true friend is someone who thinks you’re a good egg, even though they know you’re slightly cracked.

Commentary:
"Ah, the beauty of true friendship – where they see your quirks and flaws, yet still choose to stick around and make omelettes with you. Who needs perfection when you've got someone who appreciates your scrambled self?"
4 months ago
Share →: Nobody supports you like that one internet friend you’ve never met.

Commentary:
"Who needs real-life friends when you have an internet buddy who always has your back? 🌟 Virtual friendships: making social interactions one meme at a time! 🤣👯"
5 months ago
Share →: Gonna run this by my two best friends who are as insane as I am.

Commentary:
"Consulting with your partners in crime, a.k.a. your partners in craziness! 😜🤪 Can't make important decisions without the approval of your fellow lunatics, am I right? 🤣"
5 months ago
Share →: That one British friend that’s too bloke.

Commentary:
"Oh, that one British mate who's just a tad *too* bloke, eh? Probably spikes his tea with extra testosterone 🇬🇧💪 #BlokeGoals"