Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇺 has viewed:

My ex texted me saying, “Hey, I miss you,” so I replied, “Sorry, I have zero bars — the past doesn’t have good reception.”

Someone from 🇧🇭 has copied:

The holidays may be over by my work ethic is still out of the office.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has bookmarked:

Agriculture can’t possibly be a dying industry. Bot farms are booming.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has bookmarked:

Whenever I see an athlete eating quark, I get sad, because the quark could have been turned into cheesecake.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has copied:

Therapy is life letting you speak to the manager.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has bookmarked:

There should be a withering shamrock emoji so that people can express misfortune or Irish grief.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has viewed:

The biggest problem with working from home? I want to go home even though I’m already at home.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has downloaded:

Probably the most humiliating thing that can happen when you die is that you come back as a fitted-sheet ghost.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has shared:

My fairytale would be called the princess and the pea sized bladder.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has copied:

When people say they’re speechless, I always hope they mean it, but they never stop talking.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

817 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,979

Funny Quotes Topics

13,919

Funny Quotes Images

10,979

29 minutes ago

3,440

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Messenger:

I just finally discovered what’s wrong with my brain: on the left side there is nothing right and on the right side, there is nothing left.

Just shared via Messenger:

RIP to everyone killed by the Gods for their hubris, but I’m different. And better. Maybe even better than the Gods.

Just shared via YouTube:

Yes, I know there is a really special place in hell for me. It’s called a throne.

Just landed via Facebook:

Keep smiling, it makes people wonder what you’re up to.

Just landed via Slack:

I had a dream about you. You were stupid there, too.

Shared recently on Slack:

I’ve heard that some people have kids who sleep through the night and I’d like to know if they use tranquilizers or chloroform.

Shared recently on TikTok:

My reality check bounced, guess I’ll have to stay insane for the time being.

Shared recently on Telegram:

You’ll never realize how crazy you really are until you fall in love.

Going viral on Threads:

Really wanted to be a therapist until I read some of your guys’ posts and problems, and I want nothing to do with that mess.

Seen just now on Discord:

To quote Hamlet Act III, Scene III, Line 92 “No.”

Home » Funny Good Quotes

287 Funny good quotes

Funny good quotes turn the simple idea of “good” into something far more entertaining! 😄👍 Whether it’s finding humor in the “good” moments that go wrong or celebrating the irony of what we call “good,” these quotes prove that everything is funnier with a little twist. Here’s to finding the funny in the good stuff! 😂🎉💯

New funny good quotes 👇

5 days ago
Share →: Scrolling… good take… bad take… nothing take… cyberbullying… beautiful woman.

Commentary:
That sounds like my daily emotional rollercoaster on social media 🎢🧐💬👀💕
6 days ago
Share →: Therapy is basically me saying, “I did a thing,” and my therapist saying, “Yay, good job!”

Commentary:
Me in therapy: "Guess what, I adulted today!" 😂💪 #AchievementUnlocked 🏆✨
7 days ago
Share →: One thing no one mentions about being an adult is how much time you debate with yourself over keeping a cardboard box because it’s a really good box.

Commentary:
Adulting Level: Expert – When you start hoarding boxes like they're limited edition collectibles! 📦😂📦
1 week ago
Share →: Sometimes happiness is just having a good night’s sleep.

Commentary:
Ah, the magical land of sleep, where problems get bored and leave! 😴✨😂
1 week ago
Share →: Having a Bible verse in your bio doesn’t make you a good person.

Commentary:
Just like having a fork in your pocket doesn’t make you a chef! 🍴😂
1 week ago
Share →: I’m not good with plants or people, but I am good with books and buffets.

Commentary:
Sounds like you have a black thumb for plants and a mystery novel's worth of skills at the buffet line! 🌱❌📚🥘
1 week ago
Share →: Why can’t they use deep fake technology for good instead of evil? Like taking Zoom meetings for you, stuff like that.

Commentary:
Finally, a use for deep fake technology that saves us from the 'Can you hear me now?' struggle! 🤔🤖💼
1 week ago
Share →: Most of Twitter could probably use a good bop on the nose with a rolled-up newspaper.

Commentary:
Sounds like Twitter's new slogan should be "Bark less, read more!" 📰🐶
1 week ago
Share →: Waiting patiently for something good to happen, like that goat in Jurassic Park.

Commentary:
Still waiting, but at least I don't have to worry about becoming a dinosaur snack! 🦖🐐😅
1 week ago
Share →: A good way to get out of a conversation is to take off one of your socks and hand it to the person talking.

Commentary:
"New conversation hack: Sock it to 'em! 🧦😂 They'll be speechless (and possibly sockless)!"

For even more funny good quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny good quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

817 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,979

Funny Quotes Topics

13,919

Funny Quotes Images

10,979

29 minutes ago

3,425

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇼 has downloaded:

If my wife doesn’t win anything on this $1 scratch ticket, it’s going to go down as one of the worst anniversary gifts ever.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has copied:

I’m not crazy, I’m just mentally spicy.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has downloaded:

I drink all this water and for what. Just to pee? This planet is a prison.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has viewed:

Oh great, you brought your ancient ancestors with you.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has viewed:

I’m not totally useless. I can be used as a bad example.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has copied:

Being an adult is crazy. Because what the hell is going on?

Someone from 🇵🇾 has downloaded:

I’m not a dietitian, but if you eat pizza right at midnight your body doesn’t know if the calories go towards yesterday or today so they don’t count.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has viewed:

I think airplanes would be way cooler if the wings flapped like a bird.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has shared:

“Do not touch” must be one of the scariest things to read in braille.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has copied:

You don’t need to explain yourself if you carry a chainsaw.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via LinkedIn:

I really think my coworkers and I deserve an Oscar for acting like everything at work is fine.

Spotted on Facebook:

Marriage tip: If your wife goes silent in the middle of an argument, you probably shouldn’t ask if you can go back to mowing the lawn.

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

What doesn’t kill you makes you weird at social gatherings.

Trending via Reddit:

My dogs don’t feel earthquakes because they have constant gas.

Just shared via TikTok:

Me summer vacation planning: I’m going to Europe. Bank account: You’re going camping.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

That urge to nap between 3pm – 5pm is no joke.

Just landed via Slack:

Welcome to your 50’s, you’ll look for your phone while scrolling on your phone.

Broadcasted on Reddit:

A lot of y’all don’t understand politics because your history teacher was the football coach.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

Vaping: When you feel like smoking but don’t want to look cool.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

See you when you get home from school, I whisper to my kid’s apple.

Share Wordgag 🙏

© 2025. All fights retarded. 🤪

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴