13 Funny lucky quotes

• I am so lucky that I can’t tell the difference between a heartfelt compliment and sarcastic disdain. Life is much easier when you’re dumb.

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  2 months ago

  am, compliment, difference, disdain, disinterest, dumb, easier, humor, i, ignorance, irony, life, luck, lucky, much, sarcasm, sarcastic, self-deprecating, simplicity, tell

• If you say “awesome sauce” on a first date, you’ll still have that lucky condom in your wallet tomorrow.

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  2 months ago

  awesome, awesome sauce, condom, date, first date, funny moment, humor, lucky, lucky condom, moment, relationship, sauce, say, still, tomorrow, wallet

• At my age, “getting lucky” means walking into a room and remembering what you came in there for.

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  2 months ago

  age, came, forgetfulness, getting, humor, life, luck, lucky, means, memory, remembering, room, walking

• Lucky for me, I don’t have enough friends for an intervention.

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  2 months ago

  enough, friends, humor, i, intervention, life, loneliness, luck, lucky, me, social, social life

• People always tell me I’d be “late to my own funeral” like it’s a bad thing. They’d be lucky if I even showed up to that depressing shit.

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  2 months ago

  always, bad, bad thing, depressing, even, funeral, humor, i, ID, late, lucky, me, own, people, shit, show, show up, tell, thing

• I’m one of those lucky people that can eat whatever they want and not put on any clothes.

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  2 months ago

  body, body image, clothes, eat, food, humor, image, lucky, lucky person, people, person, put, self-deprecation, want, whatever

• Hit my coworker with “you’re a lucky man” after I saw a picture of his wife just to let him know that I want to sleep with her.

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  2 months ago

  after, coworker, flirtation, hit, humor, i, joke, just, know, let, lucky, lucky man, man, picture, saw, sleep, want, wife, workplace

• This bouncer’s lucky I’m with my lady and physically frightened of him or he’d be in a world of pain.

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  2 months ago

  bouncer, date, frightened, humor, lady, lucky, night, night out, pain, physically, relationship, world

• If someone asks you why you’re single, just answer with: “Got lucky.”

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  2 months ago

  answer, dating, humor, just, lucky, relationship, response, single, someone

• Hot girl in her 20s: It’s so weird, but I keep getting lucky, and everything works out in my favor.

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  4 months ago

  20s, everything, favor, getting, girl, good, good luck, hot, hot girl, i, keep, life, luck, lucky, success, weird, works

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