35 Funny lying quotes

• Bedrotting is so nice. Just lying in bed, using your phone comfortably.

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  4 hours ago

  bed, bedrotting, comfort, just, leisure, lying, lying down, nice, phone, relaxation, using

• Accidentally used men’s shower gel today, and I can already feel myself lying for no reason.

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  9 hours ago

  accidentally, care, feel, gel, humor, i, identity, lying, men, mistake, myself, personal, personal care, reason, shower, shower gel, today, used

• How late is too late to still be lying in bed, naked, drinking coffee?

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  18 hours ago

  bed, coffee, drinking, humor, late, lying, morning, naked, relaxation, still, too

• I be outside telling people I don’t got social media when they ask.

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  18 hours ago

  ask, conversation, excuse, got, honesty, humor, i, interaction, lying, media, outside, people, social, social interaction, social media, telling

• I was born tired, and I will die tired. If I ever tell you I’m not tired, I’m probably lying.

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  19 hours ago

  born, born tired, death, die, ever, exhaustion, humor, i, lying, tell, tired

• I told my computer I needed a break, now it sends me reminders to stretch while I’m lying on the couch.

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  22 hours ago

  break, computer, couch, humor, i, lying, me, procrastination, reminder, stretch, technology, told, while

• I don’t care if I’m standing in the window, if I said I ain’t home, I ain’t home.

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  23 hours ago

  care, denial, home, honesty, humor, i, lying, said, standing, stubbornness, window

• Women are actually very understanding if you’re honest with them, especially if they like you. You don’t even have to do all that lying.

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  1 month ago

  actually, communication, even, honesty, humor, lying, relationship, understanding, woman, women

• It’s the perfect time of year to focus on my indoor hobbies, like lying down in a dark room and feeling insane.

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  2 months ago

  dark, dark room, feeling, feeling insane, focus, health, hobby, humor, indoor, indoor hobby, insane, lying, lying down, mental, mental health, perfect, perfect time, relaxation, room, self-care, time, year

• I automatically assume everyone finds me unattractive until they tell me otherwise, and then I assume that they are lying to make fun of me.

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  2 months ago

  assume, everyone, finds, fun, humor, i, insecurity, interaction, issues, lying, me, otherwise, sarcasm, self-doubt, skepticism, social, social interaction, tell, trust, trust issues, unattractive, unattractiveness

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