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231 Funny should quotes

They should invent a good thing that happens.

2 months ago

Don’t worry. You’re exactly where you should be in life. Because you’ve made horrible choices.

2 months ago

Cats are probably like: Oh, I should follow you on Litterboxd.

2 months ago

Eating trail mix should count as hiking.

2 months ago

They should release the Epstein list right before the Oscars.

2 months ago

Cupid’s arrow should have just killed me instead.

2 months ago

Overthinking should at least burn calories.

2 months ago

We should all go into advertising and fix what’s going on with commercials. They need our help.

2 months ago

They should invent a way to delete other people’s posts.

2 months ago

They should invent friends whose schedules line up with yours.

2 months ago

They should let me go inside everyones house just to see.

2 months ago

I don’t get involved in anyone’s business, let alone their drama. You should try it.

2 months ago

My least controversial opinion is that IKEA should have a bar. I think we were meant to consume three beers and then purchase a Gjörfbunkle.

3 months ago

We should all start texting each other like old time explorers. ‘Dearest friend, I have survived another week. The horrors persist.’

3 months ago

They should make a tanning bed that constantly rolls you over like a gas station hotdog.

3 months ago

Being insane should at least burn calories.

3 months ago

All I’m saying is that big burgers should be wider not taller.

3 months ago

You seem really unhinged, we should grab coffee sometime.

3 months ago

I’ve deleted enough tweets to know that I should never get a tattoo.

3 months ago

They should make a separate airport for people who know how to act like they’ve been out in public before.

3 months ago