Funny quotes special

15 Funny special quotes

They should have a special lane for texting and driving.

2 days ago

I love being married. It’s so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.

2 months ago

Does my special place in hell have wi-fi?

2 months ago

Just as “magic spells” use special rhymes and archaic terms to signal their power, the convoluted language of legalese acts to convey a sense of authority.

2 months ago

Always keep a bottle of wine in the fridge for special occasions. Like Wednesday.

2 months ago

Being a serial killer is much like being a comedian, in that you either hit it big and get your own Netflix special, or you spend eternity popping up on shitty podcasts.

3 months ago

The hairdresser asking me what special plans I have for the day like this wasn’t it.

3 months ago

Congratulations on angrily speeding past me to get to the red light first. You’re special.

3 months ago

If you ever get attacked by a shark, just be a good sport about it and let it eat you. Hey, look on the bright side: It’s a rare occurrence, so you’re special.

3 months ago

The IRS needs special envelopes for when you’re not in trouble.

3 months ago

There should be a special rating system for movies that tells you how uncomfortable you’ll be if you watch them with your parents.

3 months ago

Most people in your life will come and go but occasionally you’ll meet someone really special who makes you contemplate murder.

3 months ago

I’m so old, I still keep special moments in my heart and not in my Insta story.

3 months ago

Everyone is awful in their own special way.

3 months ago

Yes, I know there is a really special place in hell for me. It’s called a throne.

3 months ago