86 Funny break quotes

• Took a break from social media because my cat was asleep on my phone.

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  1 week ago

  asleep, break, cat, funny situation, media, phone, situation, sleep, social, social media

• You don’t even have to date, by the way. You can just take a break from love and then randomly meet the actual love of your life somewhere you weren’t even supposed to be.

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  2 weeks ago

  actual, break, date, even, humor, just, life, love, meet, meeting, relationship, somewhere, take, unexpected, unexpected meeting

• Took a break from Twitter for my mental health, so I’d figure I’d come back to ruin it again.

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  2 weeks ago

  again, back, break, comeback, figure, health, humor, ID, irony, media, mental, mental health, ruin, self-deprecation, social, social media, Twitter

• The most unrealistic part of Christmas movies isn’t the existence of Santa… it’s that all these people have, like, a month off work with no interruptions.

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  3 weeks ago

  break, Christmas, Christmas movie, existence, expectation, holiday, holiday break, holiday season, humor, interruption, interruptions, month, most, movie, people, Santa, season, time, time off, unrealistic, unrealistic expectation, work, work interruption

• I talk to one guy, and he wants to break my heart. I talk to five guys, and they all wanna take me seriously.

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  1 month ago

  break, conversation, dating, five, guy, guys, heart, heartbreak, humor, i, love, me, relationship, seriously, seriousness, take, talk, wants

• I’m sorry to break it to you, but you need a soul to have a soulmate.

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  1 month ago

  break, dating, humor, love, need, relationship, sarcasm, sorry, soul, soulmate, witty

• I did 30 minutes of chores, time for a 7-hour break.

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  1 month ago

  30, break, chore, chores, humor, i, laziness, management, minutes, procrastination, time, time management

• The divorce process is easier than breaking up with your hair stylist.

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  1 month ago

  break, break up, breaking, comparison, divorce, easier, hair, hair stylist, humor, process, relationship, stylist

• Why is smoking the only addiction jobs give you breaks to do? I should get 15 minutes every hour to cook up some parlays.

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  2 months ago

  addiction, addiction humor, break, break time, breaks, cook, every, gambling, give, hour, humor, i, job, job break, jobs, minutes, only, parlay, should, smoking, time, why, work, work humor

• Dating again after you break up with a long-term partner is like dying in a video game and ending up back at the start to do it all again, except with less health.

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  2 months ago

  after, again, back, break, breakup, dating, dying, ending, except, game, health, humor, less, long-term, long-term relationship, partner, relationship, relationship struggle, restart, start, struggle, video, video game

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