74 Funny career quotes

• I’ve started ripping my shirt in half like Hulk Hogan when I mean business. Long story short, I’m looking for a new job.

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  2 months ago

  business, career, career change, change, half, hogan, Hulk, Hulk Hogan, humor, i, job, job search, looking, mean, motivation, new, relief, ripping, search, shirt, shirt ripping, short, story, stress, stress relief, workplace, workplace humor

• Don’t ask me for work advice, I’m just going to tell you to quit your job.

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  2 months ago

  advice, ask, career, going, humor, job, just, me, quit, quitting, quitting job, sarcasm, tell, work, work advice, workplace

• I wish that reading books in the park were my job, and I got paid six figures for it.

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  2 months ago

  activity, aspiration, books, career, dream, dream job, figures, fun, fun activity, got, i, job, leisure, paid, park, reading, relaxation, six, six figures, wish

• When I retire, I’m going to run for office.

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  2 months ago

  ambition, career, election, going, humor, i, joke, office, politics, retire, retirement, run

• Everyone has that one friend they’ve known for years and still have no idea what they actually do for a living, but it’s too late to ask.

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  2 months ago

  actually, ask, career, curiosity, everyone, friend, humor, idea, late, living, long-term, mystery, relationship, social, still, too

• I can literally trace the moment my career died back to when my boss said he was in back-to-back meetings, and I said, “Isn’t face-to-face better?”

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  2 months ago

  back, better, boss, boss humor, career, died, face-to-face, humor, i, life, meetings, moment, office, professional, professional life, said, sarcasm, workplace

• Be the reason your therapist reevaluates their entire career.

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  2 months ago

  career, health, humor, mental, mental health, reason, reevaluation, self-awareness, therapist, therapy

• What career is most compatible with the unemployed lifestyle?

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  2 months ago

  career, compatible, humor, joke, lifestyle, most, unemployed, unemployment, work

• Career? Never heard of her. I’m majoring in sunshine and snacks.

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  2 months ago

  career, carefree, casual, humor, motivation, never, playful, snack, snacks, sunshine

• My career goal is to be able to just delete my LinkedIn account at some point.

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  2 months ago

  able, account, career, career goal, delete, detox, digital, digital detox, goal, humor, job, just, LinkedIn, media, online, online presence, point, presence, social, social media

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