12 Funny crash quotes

• I can relate to the stock market because I am always about to crash at a moment’s notice.

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  1 day ago

  always, am, anxiety, crash, finance, humor, i, market, moment, moments, notice, relate, stock, stock market

• I crashed my bike in 1989 and hurt my knee real bad. We didn’t have social media back then so I’m telling you guys now.

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  1 day ago

  1989, bike, bike crash, crash, injury, knee, knee injury, media, nostalgia, social, social media, storytelling

• Next time I feel incompetent at my job, I hope I remember that someone once pushed a live software update that crashed half the planet.

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  1 week ago

  crash, fail, feel, half, hope, humor, i, incompetence, job, live, next, once, perspective, planet, remember, software, software update, someone, tech, tech fail, time, update, workplace

• Guy who normally applauds when the plane lands right before the pilot crashes it: “Boo!”

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  1 week ago

  applaud, before, boo, crash, guy, humor, irony, pilot, plane, reaction, right

• It’s weird how the UFO’s always seem to crash in places that only the government and military have access to.

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  2 weeks ago

  access, always, conspiracy, crash, government, humor, military, places, UFO, weird, weirdness

• All I want for Christmas this year is the housing market to crash, so I could buy a 5-bedroom, 4-bathroom house for $3.

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  2 weeks ago

  3, bathroom, bedroom, buy, Christmas, crash, house, housing, housing market, humor, i, market, price, want, wish, year

• So crazy to just be living every day through the slow-motion car crash of escalating fascism, and it’s still like, “Aww, man, I have to go to the dentist.”

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  2 weeks ago

  car, car crash, crash, crazy, daily, daily life, day, dentist, every, fascism, frustration, humor, i, irony, just, life, living, man, motion, slow, slow motion, still, through

• Something very chic about crying while driving… have to keep it a little classy so you don’t crash… other drivers unaware a diva is down in the next lane over…

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  2 weeks ago

  chic, classy, crash, crying, diva, driver, drivers, driving, keep, lane, little, next, over, something, while

• I typed my name into Google’s search bar and it immediately auto-filled to “Doesn’t even listen to instructions” before crashing under the weight of disappointed search results.

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  2 weeks ago

  bar, before, crash, disappointed, disappointment, even, Google, humor, i, instruction, instructions, listen, name, results, sarcasm, search, under, weight

• Long shower. Fresh sheets. Hair braided. Lights off. Candle glowing. Room smells incredible. Airplane crash videos on.

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  4 weeks ago

  airplane, airplane crash video, braid, candle, crash, dark, dark humor, fresh, glowing, hair, hair braid, humor, incredible, irony, light, light off, lights, relaxation, room, room smell, sheet, sheets, shower, smell, smells, video, videos

All funny crash quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌