48 Funny difference quotes

• The biggest difference between my toddler and me is that if I had poop on my butt, that’d be priority #1.

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  5 days ago

  1, butt, childhood, difference, humor, hygiene, i, me, parent, parenting, poop, priority, toddler

• If you want to sell something to a woman, show her other women using it. If you want to sell something to a man, prove to him no other man has it.

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  5 days ago

  advertising, behavior, consumer, consumer behavior, difference, gender, gender difference, humor, man, marketing, prove, sales, sales strategy, sell, show, something, strategy, using, want, woman, women

• Grok, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.

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  6 days ago

  accept, acceptance, change, courage, difference, grant, grok, humor, i, inspiration, know, me, serenity, things, wisdom

• Men make money to be with a woman, but women make money to not have to be with a man. Clock it!

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  6 days ago

  clock, difference, gender, gender difference, humor, independence, man, men, money, relationship, woman, women

• I wish men had sluttier outfit options. Because why am I in a mini skirt, and you’re in a quarter zip?

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  6 days ago

  am, clothing, difference, fashion, gender, gender difference, humor, i, men, mini, mini skirt, options, outfit, quarter, quarter zip, skirt, why, wish, zip

• Main difference between me and my jokes is that folks don’t laugh at my jokes.

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  6 days ago

  difference, folks, humor, joke, jokes, laugh, main, me, self-deprecation

• Parenting a teenager is surreal because you’ll be sitting there, and some dude who is much taller than you will walk around the corner and ask you how to open a popcorn bag.

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  7 days ago

  around, ask, awkward, awkward question, bag, corner, difference, dude, family, family life, funny moment, height, height difference, humor, life, moment, much, open, parenting, popcorn, question, sitting, snack, surreal, taller, teenager, walk

• People who can’t tell the difference between whole numbers and decimals are missing the point.

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  1 week ago

  decimal, difference, humor, joke, math, math humor, missing, misunderstanding, number, numbers, people, point, pun, tell, whole, wordplay

• Boys say that girls are dramatic, but have you ever plucked a man’s eyebrow? They act like they’ve been shot.

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  1 week ago

  act, boy, boys, difference, dramatic, ever, eyebrow, gender, gender difference, girl, girls, humor, man, pain, pluck, say, shot

• I’m gonna be the first zoomer to start dropping the ‘two thousand’ when referring to the past. “Yeah, that was back in ‘17.”

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  1 week ago

  back, date, difference, dropping, evolution, generational, generational difference, humor, language, language evolution, nostalgia, past, reference, slang, start, year, year reference, Zoomer

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