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New funny quotes: 56 this month

15,809 funny quotes and pics

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Updated: Mar 13, 2026

 

 

 

 

19 Funny invite quotes

Funny invite quotes bring the perfect splash of humor to your party plans 🎉😂 Whether you’re hosting a casual hangout or a wild celebration, adding a witty twist to your invites makes everyone smile before they even arrive 😄📩 Get ready to set the mood with laughter and good vibes that’ll have your guests counting down the minutes! 🎈🥳

Please don’t invite me over if you have a leather chair that’s already peeling. I will peel it some more when you’re not looking.

Posted onFeb 3, 2026

Sure, you can invite more people to the plans we made 2 months ago. The more, the merrier. Also, I’m not going now.

Posted onFeb 3, 2026

Don’t invite me anywhere last minute. I enjoy doing nothing, so I need to know ahead of time if my plan to do nothing needs to be changed.

Posted onFeb 3, 2026

If you keep your AC any higher than 75, please don’t invite me to your terrarium, you lizard.

Posted onFeb 1, 2026

My neighbor is having some kind of party and didn’t invite me. I guess I have to call the cops again.

Posted onJan 31, 2026

Every Microsoft Teams invite you get lowers your testosterone by 1-2%

Posted onJan 31, 2026

I’m having people over to stare at their phones later, if you want to come by.

Posted onJan 30, 2026

Hey, wanna intertwine delusions and make them a reality or nah?

Posted onJan 29, 2026

Because it is Friday, I will allow one beautiful woman to invite me for drinks.

Posted onJan 23, 2026

That moment of panic when they invite you inside at the start of the birthday party you thought was a drop off.

Posted onJan 23, 2026

I bet when you invited me to Thanksgiving dinner you didn’t think I’d stay this long.

Posted onJan 23, 2026

Rom-com idea: Gozilla +1. Godzilla gets invited to a wedding but struggles to convince anyone to go with him.

Posted onJan 22, 2026

Don’t invite me places. I was cesarean. I didn’t want to come out then and I certainly don’t want to now.

Posted onJan 21, 2026

Normalize asking if this is an intervention whenever someone invites you over.

Posted onJan 21, 2026

I am not someone you have to entertain if you invite me, because I will have canceled.

Posted onJan 21, 2026

I am not someone you have to host if you invite me, because I will have canceled.

Posted onJan 21, 2026

I take offense when people don’t invite me to events l’d like to turn down.

Posted onJan 20, 2026

Hello, hi. Don’t invite me anywhere until next year. The money is finished. Regards.

Posted onJan 19, 2026

Don’t invite me if there’s nowhere to sit down.

Posted onJan 18, 2026

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