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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇬 has downloaded:

I don’t want to brag but I walked into a room and remembered why I walked in.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has downloaded:

Who you are before you have your coffee is the real you.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has copied:

I don’t want your hoodie, I want your still-beating heart presented to me in a box.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has shared:

I hate that moment when you are tired and sleepy but as soon as you go to bed your body is like “just kidding.”

Someone from 🇧🇯 has viewed:

I’ve got the nativity scene facing the TV, so baby Jesus can watch “Die Hard.”

Someone from 🇲🇽 has shared:

I would like to unsubscribe from all responsibilities, please and thank you.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has bookmarked:

Nobody cleans better than someone who’s pissed off.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has copied:

It’s always “your monthly bill is available,” never “this month is on us.”

Someone from 🇦🇴 has shared:

I hate liars, but what I hate more is when they think I’m an idiot and won’t find out the truth.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has viewed:

You don’t scare me, you’re not my ID photo.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

501 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,094

Funny Quotes Topics

17,246

Funny Quotes Images

15,094

Updated

Dec 22, 2025

Users Online

3,846

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Slack:

Me, gently telling my kids that I ate the rest of the ice cream: Your dad ate the rest of the ice cream.

Seen just now on Reddit:

Lady just asked me what “mansplaining” is. I think it’s a trap. We’ve been staring at each other in silence for half an hour.

Shared recently on Facebook:

Gonna break into your house, toast all your bread and put it back in the bag.

Shared recently on Threads:

I hate when I go to the kitchen looking for food, and all I find is ingredients.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

I’m a big fan of that post-laundry feeling when you’ve got all your A-list clothes back in the game.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Real introverts are too introverted to tell people they’re introverts.

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

Aliens probably have group chats called Don’t Stop on Earth.

Going bananas on LinkedIn:

When the Olympics finally introduces the event “Dropping your phone and very nearly catching it but not quite” then you’ll all see me shine.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

The tragedy of my life is that I theoretically know when I shouldn’t say anything. And then I hear myself talking.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Schedule your bikini wax for the first thing in the morning, and you won’t need that cup of coffee.

Home » Funny Little Quotes » Page 21

220 Funny little quotes

More funny little quotes 👇

It triggers the little girl in me when I feel like I’m not being listened to when I’m talking.

0

4 months ago

being, being listened, feel, feeling, girl, i, listened, little, little girl, me, talking, trigger
I’m always a little mean to men because, if you treat them like humans, they think you wanna sleep with them.

0

4 months ago

always, dating, gender, human, humans, humor, interaction, little, man, mean, men, relationship, sleep, think, treat
No offense, fellas, we love compliments, but a compliment from another woman means just a little bit more.

0

4 months ago

another, appreciation, bit, compliment, compliment from woman, compliments, fellas, just, little, love, means, offense, woman
Aren’t you a little old to be a bully?

0

4 months ago

age, bully, humor, insult, little, old, teasing
A little time spent not acting your age is never a bad thing.

0

4 months ago

acting, age, bad, behavior, fun, humor, little, never, playfulness, spent, thing, time, youthfulness
Something very chic about crying while driving… have to keep it a little classy so you don’t crash… other drivers unaware a diva is down in the next lane over…

0

4 months ago

chic, classy, crash, crying, diva, driver, drivers, driving, keep, lane, little, next, over, something, while
A little mischievousness is good for the soul.

0

4 months ago

fun, good, humor, little, mischievousness, personality, playful, soul
“God has a plan for you.” OK, is God open to a little feedback?

0

4 months ago

communication, divine, divine plan, feedback, God, humor, little, ok, open, plan, sarcasm
Once you are able to find humor in any situation, you’ve either reached enlightenment or you’re just a little unhinged.

0

5 months ago

able, enlightenment, humor, just, little, mindset, once, situation, unhinged
What doesn’t kill you, makes you stronger, but also a little grumpy.

0

5 months ago

adversity, attitude, grumpiness, grumpy, humor, kill, little, motivation, resilience, strength

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Social Media Stars ⭐

32 shares on WeChat this month:

My favorite delusion is that I just need to get through this week.

17 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Hiring a mortician to do my makeup while I sleep.

10 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Imagine you go bowling by yourself and you go sit down, but it’s your turn again.

46 shares on Threads this month:

Forget tagging friends, I want to be able to tag my enemies.

84 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Therapy isn’t enough. I need to be electrocuted and get my memory erased.

76 shares on YouTube this month:

I wish I could put an AirTag on my sanity.

20 shares on Discord this month:

My husband threw away a perfectly good box as if we might not need it in 20 years.

98 shares on Snapchat this month:

I wish I loved anything as much as people love to say they are “thrilled” on LinkedIn.

68 shares on Threads this month:

“You’re like if 9 a.m. on a Monday was a person.”

20 shares on X this month:

A poorly timed two-factor authentication request will be the thing that finally kills me.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇾 has shared:

College core: you sit in the class for attendance, then go home and teach yourself.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has bookmarked:

Counting calories is a great way to combine super fun things like math and not eating.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has downloaded:

For Thanksgiving don’t ask me about my life, just pass me the bottle.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has downloaded:

By 30, you should have settled down with an addiction that works for your lifestyle, no second guessing. You go to work, come home, and [addiction].

Someone from 🇬🇲 has copied:

I hope one of the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse is single.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has bookmarked:

I love that cats slap the shit out of everything they can’t understand.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has shared:

I don’t have a five-year plan because every two years I realize I need a different life.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has downloaded:

Why did they call it an AI-generated picture and not a ‘fauxtograph’?

Someone from 🇲🇬 has viewed:

I need a job where I don’t actually have to work.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has copied:

Why does the dentist have to take an x-ray of my teeth? They right there, bro!

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Twitch:

You didn’t let me know you got home safely so you better at least be injured or I’m gonna be pissed.

Just landed via YouTube:

I’d never pick the lesser of two evils because that means they’re not even good at being evil either.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

If I’m not back in five minutes, just wait longer.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

Forgot my glasses, so I’m pointing at a random spot on the menu and hoping for the best.

Going viral on Discord:

You can have kids or you can always know where your scissors are. You can’t have both.

Going viral on Discord:

I can easily spot a wolf in sheep’s clothing but this guy was dressed like my grandmother which threw me off.

Going viral on Snapchat:

He died doing what he did best, trying to get a croc to wear a Croc.

Shared recently on Reddit:

That awkward moment when everything is going so perfectly… and then you wake up.

Going viral on Twitch:

I want Wolverine claws. Not for violence or anything. I want them for easing my way through reality. Like opening an Amazon package.

Seen just now on YouTube:

If a stranger starts talking to me in an elevator I say “I don’t want to talk in case we get stuck and I have to eat you” that usually shuts them up.

Activity Log ✨

220 Funny little quotes

More funny little quotes 👇

All funny little quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨