346 Funny say quotes

• If I say, “First of all,” run away, because I have prepared peer-reviewed research, data, and charts, and I will destroy you.

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  1 month ago

  away, charts, confidence, data, destroy, humor, humorous, humorous quote, i, intimidation, prepared, research, run, sarcasm, say, wit

• Some things are better left unsaid, which I usually realize after I say them.

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  1 month ago

  after, better, communication, humor, i, irony, left, mistake, realize, regret, say, saying, silence, things, thoughts, unsaid

• I’ve had 50 birthdays in a row without being arrested, which I’d say is an impressive streak!

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  1 month ago

  50, age, arrest, arrested, being, birthday, celebration, humor, ID, impressive, row, say, streak

• They say money can’t buy happiness, but could someone just give me a lot of it and let me see for myself?

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  1 month ago

  buy, desire, experiment, give, happiness, humor, irony, just, let, lot, me, money, myself, perspective, say, someone, wealth

• If you say something while exhaling smoke, it is 10 times more profound.

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  1 month ago

  comedy, exaggeration, humor, humor style, humorous, humorous observation, irony, observation, sarcasm, satire, say, smoke, smoking, something, style, times, while, wit

• Gentle parenting is making sure your kids can’t hear what you say when you’re peeling a mango.

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  1 month ago

  activity, family, gentle, gentle parenting, hear, humor, kids, kids activity, making, mango, parenting, parenting humor, peeling, say, sure

• Thinking about writing my own eulogy because I don’t want my loved ones to say I’m a control freak.

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  1 month ago

  control, control freak, dark, dark humor, death, eulogy, freak, funny perspective, funny thought, humor, i, loved, ones, own, perspective, quirky, relatable, say, thinking, thought, thoughts, want, writing

• I don’t really like the song “I’ve Got a Feeling” by Black Eyed Peas, but I just like the part where they say “Mazel Tov.”

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  1 month ago

  black, Black Eyed Peas, eyed, favorite, favorite part, feeling, got, humor, i, i’ve, I’ve Got a Feeling, just, lyric, mazel, Mazel Tov, music, music preference, peas, preference, sarcasm, say, song, tov, where

• When people say, “Stop living in the past,” my thought in turn is, “But the music was so much better then!”

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  1 month ago

  better, humor, living, longing, much, music, nostalgia, past, people, sarcasm, say, stop, thought, turn

• What I’m trying to say is, “Hello, here’s my entire heart and all of my devotion.”

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  1 month ago

  devotion, expression, heart, hello, humor, romantic, say, sentiment, trying

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