23 Funny sentence quotes

• It’s so beautiful to see people just give up at work this time of year. I’m getting emails that do not include any complete sentences.

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  6 days ago

  beautiful, Christmas, complete, email, emails, getting, give, holiday, holiday season, humor, just, people, procrastination, season, sentence, time, work, year

• 69% of people find something dirty in every sentence.

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  1 week ago

  dirty, every, humor, humor statistic, joke, observation, people, perception, playful, sarcasm, sentence, something, statistic

• I got called “pretty” today! Well, the full sentence was “You’re pretty annoying,” but I only focus on the positive things.

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  1 week ago

  annoying, compliment, focus, full, got, humor, i, irony, joke, only, positive, positivity, pretty, sarcasm, self-deprecating, sentence, things, today, well, wit

• Spending 5 minutes looking up every word I want to use in a sentence to make sure I can define it in case they ask.

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  1 week ago

  5, ask, case, education, every, humor, i, language, learning, looking, lookup, minutes, preparation, procrastination, sentence, spending, study, sure, vocabulary, want, word, word lookup, writing

• If you finish every sentence with “as the prophecy foretold”, your coworkers will leave you alone.

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  1 week ago

  alone, coworkers, distraction, every, finish, humor, leave, prophecy, sentence, workplace

• I end all my sentences with “Just saying..” because ending them with “You bonehead..” would probably be considered offensive.

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  1 week ago

  bonehead, communication, end, humor, i, just, just saying, offensive, sarcasm, saying, sentence, wit

• Couples who finish each other’s sentences have killed before and will kill again.

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  1 week ago

  communication, couple, dark, dark humor, humor, intimacy, kill, relationship, sentence

• People found guilty of not using punctuation deserve the longest sentence possible.

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  1 week ago

  comedy, deserve, found, grammar, guilty, humor, law, people, punctuation, sentence, writing

• Starting your most incoherent sentence with “put simply” to deflect blame onto the reader.

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  2 weeks ago

  blame, communication, deflect, deflect blame, humor, incoherent, incoherent sentence, most, put, put simply, reader, sarcasm, sentence, simply

• A colon can completely change the meaning of a sentence. For example: Jill ate her friend’s sandwich VS Jill ate her friend’s colon.

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  2 weeks ago

  change, colon, example, friend, friends, grammar, humor, joke, meaning, sandwich, sentence, vs

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