Wordgag ツ

2 months ago
Share →: How many exercise videos do you have to buy before you get some results?

Commentary:
"Oh, the age-old question of fitness enthusiasts everywhere! 💪📺 It's like a never-ending cycle of buying exercise videos in the hopes that maybe this time, this workout will be the magical one to transform us into fitness gods and goddesses! 🧘‍♂️🏋️‍♀️ Just remember, the true workout starts when you actually press play! 😉 #FitnessStruggles"
4 months ago
Share →: If I ever go missing, promise me that you won’t put my weight on the poster.

Commentary:
"Sure, just describe me as 'Last seen at the fridge' instead 🍔🍟😄 #MissingNotLost"
4 months ago
Share →: Fellas, if your lady is mad, ask her if it’s because she’s put on some weight. That’ll calm her down.

Commentary:
Ah, the age-old advice for fellas! 🤭 It's a foolproof way to set a new world record in the 100-meter "doghouse dash." 🏃‍♂️ Just remember, behind every successful man is a woman rolling her eyes. 😂 #SleepingOnTheCouchTonight
4 months ago
Share →: How to have flat stomach: remove all of your organs.

Commentary:
"Who needs organs anyway? 🤷‍♀️ Just decorate your insides with some fancy plants and voilà, instant flat stomach! 🌿 Who knew being an empty vessel could be so trendy? 😂 #OrganFreeDiet"
4 months ago
Share →: A person that weights 200 pounds on Earth weighs 76 pounds on Mars. So I’m not overweight, I’m on the wrong planet.

Commentary:
"Oh, so that's why I feel lighter on Mars! 🚀 No wonder my diet plans never seemed to work here on Earth. 🌍 It's not me, it's just planetary confusion! Can't blame a person for being a misplaced alien. 👽😂 #MarsIsMyRealHome"
4 months ago
Share →: I’ve been dieting for a little over a week and I already gained three pounds.

Commentary:
Oh, the ultimate mystery of diets – where salads make you gain weight and cookies disappear miraculously 😂🍪 It's like the scale is playing a sneaky game of hide and seek with your progress! Keep going, you're one week closer to solving the grand puzzle of dieting 😉💪
4 months ago
Share →: People would be more motivated to lose weight if the weight they lost went on to someone they didn’t like.

Commentary:
"If only we could donate our lost pounds to our frenemies, we'd all be lining up for that weight loss challenge! Just imagine the satisfaction of seeing that person struggling with our unwanted weight while we strut our stuff feeling lighter and revenge-slimmed."
4 months ago
Share →: Why can’t my fat leave me like everything else does?

Commentary:
"Well, I guess fat is just too clingy to let go. It just can't resist hanging around for the long haul, unlike those socks that mysteriously disappear in the laundry!"
4 months ago
Share →: Losing and then immediately gaining weight is my superpower.

Commentary:
"Who needs a cape when you can just fluctuate in weight like a superhero? 💪🍔🏋️‍♂️ Embracing the ultimate power of the scale, one pound at a time! 💥🦸‍♂️ #WeightLossGoals #WeightGainChamp"
5 months ago
Share →: Napping is the best activity for weight loss, because I can’t eat anything when I’m asleep!

Commentary:
"Who knew that the ultimate diet plan was just a comfy pillow away? Forget counting calories, just count sheep and let those extra pounds snooze away!"