Funny quotes Christmas

100 Funny Christmas quotes

Funny Christmas quotes are the perfect way to add some laughter to the holiday season! 🎄😂 From holiday mishaps to playful takes on Christmas traditions, these quotes capture the joy and humor of the festive time. Get ready to chuckle and spread some cheer! 😄🎅

I’ve never been to hell, but I once forgot to buy batteries for the toys on Christmas morning. The sound is still ringing in my ears.

Funny Quotes Mar 18, 2025

Santa keeps a pair of mounted antlers over his fireplace to keep the reindeer from unionizing.

Funny Quotes Mar 18, 2025

Congratulations to the people who never took their Christmas decorations down. You’re almost there.

Funny Quotes Mar 18, 2025

Every time we try to eat healthy, along comes Christmas, Easter, summer, Friday, or Tuesday, and ruins it for us.

Funny Quotes Mar 18, 2025

Santa saw your Facebook posts. This year you’re getting a dictionary.

Funny Quotes Mar 17, 2025

The week between Christmas and New Year’s should be studied as it is clearly a wormhole, disturbing time and space.

Funny Quotes Feb 25, 2025

My problem with Christmas shopping is that I keep seeing things that I like… for me.

Funny Quotes Feb 25, 2025

Everyone who got my kids board games for Christmas, when are you coming back to play with them?

Funny Quotes Feb 25, 2025

Eating cookies left for Santa because the cowboy was a no show.

Funny Quotes Feb 25, 2025

Having Christmas off in the middle of the work week and then forcing us to go back to work the next day feels so illegal.

Funny Quotes Feb 25, 2025

Now that Christmas and New Year are out of the way, we can focus on the things that really matter: My posts.

Funny Quotes Feb 1, 2025

Putting away the Christmas tree. Sad day for cats.

Funny Quotes Feb 1, 2025

I wonder if Mary and Joseph hated putting away the Christmas stuff as much as I do.

Funny Quotes Feb 1, 2025

I was going to buy my wife a car for Christmas but then I remembered I don’t live in a commercial.

Funny Quotes Jan 29, 2025

Can’t wait for my husband to see what he bought everyone for Christmas.

Funny Quotes Jan 29, 2025

This Christmas, get her the gift that’ll last a lifetime. Give her a tortoise.

Funny Quotes Jan 29, 2025

Wishing all the contacts in my phone “Merry Christmas, I hope you get what you deserve” and just letting that work itself out.

Funny Quotes Jan 29, 2025

Pretty cool that we all come together on Christmas and celebrate the birth of Santa.

Funny Quotes Jan 29, 2025

Sleeping nakey nakey nakey just in case Santa wants a different type of cookie tonight.

Funny Quotes Jan 29, 2025

Sorry I’m late. I was scraping the clearance tag off your Christmas present.

Funny Quotes Jan 29, 2025

Gonna finish eating all these Christmas cookies so I’m no longer tempted to eat them.

Funny Quotes Jan 28, 2025

Santa: “Don’t leave me milk. Leave me whiskey.”

Funny Quotes Jan 28, 2025

Everyone knows that Christmas is the celebration of the immaculate conception of Mariah Carey.

Funny Quotes Jan 28, 2025

I’ll be home for Christmas, because that’s where I live.

Funny Quotes Jan 28, 2025

When I say I’m Christmas shopping the “for myself” is silent.

Funny Quotes Jan 28, 2025