Funny quotes experience

97 Funny experience quotes

It took three employees to help me complete “self-checkout” yesterday.

Funny Quotes Apr 1, 2025

Grocery shopping while hungry feels like online shopping while drunk.

Funny Quotes Mar 18, 2025

In my experience, bowling and pancakes have the same energy. High hopes at the beginning, lowered self-esteem at the end.

Funny Quotes Mar 18, 2025

Never argue with an idiot. They will drag you down to their level and beat you with experience.

Funny Quotes Mar 18, 2025

I can’t believe I used to think I was stressed in high school.

Funny Quotes Mar 9, 2025

Clubbing is a phase that you must go through and get over.

Funny Quotes Feb 24, 2025

It doesn’t matter how bizarre your situation is. Somebody on Reddit already been there, done that.

Funny Quotes Feb 14, 2025

Vanilla perfumes are so nice. It’s like walking into a bakery but you are the bakery.

Funny Quotes Feb 11, 2025

When people are telling me a story about their life it often reminds me of a much better story from my life.

Funny Quotes Feb 4, 2025

Interviewer: “What did you learn from your previous job?” Me: “That I need a new job.”

Funny Quotes Feb 4, 2025

The secret ingredient to being really funny is childhood trauma.

Funny Quotes Feb 1, 2025

The worst thing about wearing headphones is when you hallucinate people shouting you. Like, why does this happen?

Funny Quotes Feb 1, 2025

You aren’t from the Midwest unless you can spin out in the snow, regain control and keep driving like nothing happened.

Funny Quotes Feb 1, 2025

Just looked around and realized it’s everyone’s first time living.

Funny Quotes Feb 1, 2025

This year felt like being awake during surgery.

Funny Quotes Jan 28, 2025

“Careful. It’s slippery!” – Everyone, after you’ve already slipped.

Funny Quotes Jan 28, 2025

You couldn’t pay me to do this year again.

Funny Quotes Jan 28, 2025

Why can’t Chinese restaurants chop the broccoli in their dishes? I feel like I’m trying to fit an entire bonsai tree into my mouth.

Funny Quotes Jan 28, 2025

“You live and you learn!” Bro, I don’t want to do either of those things.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025

Having a peanut allergy has to be so wild. Like, imagine you’re at a baseball game and there are people chucking bags of rattlesnakes past your head.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025

The closest I have ever come to bungee jumping was when I was born.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025

Went to the toilet today without my cell phone. There are 245 tiles.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025

Confucius says: “Those who drink a lot die earlier, but have seen twice as much in life.”

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025

They should let you spend one night in a house before you buy/rent it, just to make sure it’s haunted.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025

Don’t tell me that everything was better in the past. I was there.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025