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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇯🇴 has copied:

When we’re old, the children will use Covid to explain our brain damaged opinions much like we do to Boomers with lead. It is fate.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has shared:

I’m on a spinning rock in outer space, and I have to answer work emails.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has copied:

People will say stuff like “Well, at least if WWIII happens, I won’t have to go to work…” I think in your heart you know that’s not true.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has downloaded:

Your honor, my client doesn’t like jail.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has copied:

People are too judgmental these days… I can tell just by looking at them.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has bookmarked:

Please remember, I am an inspiration for birth control.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has copied:

Nobody told me that it takes 1-2 business days to put a snow outfit on a toddler.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has copied:

If you can’t handle me at my worst just imagine how I feel.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has downloaded:

That second wave of sleep after waking up too early.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has downloaded:

I’ve shouted so much sporting advice from my sofa already this summer. It’s very tiring but hopefully it’s helping.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1791 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

11,953

Funny Quotes Topics

14,758

Funny Quotes Images

11,953

3 minutes ago

3,428

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Discord:

Whenever I’m with real yappers, I realize I might actually be a listener.

Just landed via Telegram:

The one thing I’ve never had in my car’s glove box is a pair of gloves.

Seen just now on Threads:

I don’t even want to talk about the things I had to do to that elf to get back on the nice list.

Shared recently on Telegram:

Got a scam email full of mistakes like they’re not even trying. It won’t be long before AI takes their jobs.

Reported on Pinterest:

“You look nervous” Thanks, I’ve been practicing my whole life.

Shared recently on Telegram:

When I look at the world, I realize why Noah only took animals with him.

Spotted on YouTube:

The awkward moment when someone’s zipper is down and you don’t know whether to tell them or not.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

I wish more modern politics were about trying to stop the fulfillment of an ancient prophecy.

Trending via Discord:

The final stage of being single is when you listen to a love song and no one comes to mind; at that point, you’ve achieved absolute singularity.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

“I can’t wait to go back to bed tonight!” Me, 5 minutes after waking up.

Home » Funny Leaving Quotes

31 Funny leaving quotes

Funny leaving quotes bring a splash of humor to those bittersweet farewells! 🎉 Whether you’re saying goodbye to a job, a friend, or a chapter in life, these witty words lighten the mood and leave everyone smiling 😄. Perfect for cards, speeches, or social media posts, they turn goodbyes into giggles and make parting ways a little less serious. Ready to laugh through the farewell feels? Let’s dive in! 🚀✨

New funny leaving quotes 👇

15 hours ago
Share →: My first mistake was leaving the womb.

Commentary:
Looks like my life's GPS got stuck on 'recalculating' ever since! 🚼➡️🌀🤣
3 days ago
Share →: The only ‘survival horror’ game I play is called ‘getting up every day and leaving the house.

Commentary:
Sounds like my daily quest for coffee, but with less XP. ☕😅🏡
4 days ago
Share →: “I’m not afraid to admit when I’m wrong. For example, I thought it was a good idea to leave the house today, which, as it turns out, was a terrible mistake.”

Commentary:
Every time I leave the house, I'm reminded why sweatpants exist 😂🙈
1 week ago
Share →: Every squad has that person who has to go home early.

Commentary:
When the group chat says "party till dawn," but your inner grandma insists on bedtime by 9 PM 😴🛌✨
3 weeks ago
Share →: You should be allowed to leave work early if you miss your wife enough.

Commentary:
"Forget work benefits, I'm voting for 'Miss Your Spouse Leave Days'! 😂💼❤️ #RelationshipGoals #BestEmployeePolicy"
3 weeks ago
Share →: Thanks for leaving my door open; I was running low on houseflies.

Commentary:
"Ah, just what I needed—my personal fly-through drive-thru! 😂🪰🚪"
3 weeks ago
Share →: I am on a diet where you just speak Italian: “Pasta,” “Pizza,” and “I’m leaving Rooma for dessert.”

Commentary:
"When in Rome…or whenever you want to carb-load in style! 🍝🍕🇮🇹 #TravelByStomach"
3 weeks ago
Share →: Hi, I’m a social media user, you might know me from such hits as “I’m leaving this stupid place” and “I’m back everybody.”

Commentary:
"Ah, the classic 'social media boomerang!' 🎯👋😅 #LeavingAndReturningChamp"
1 month ago
Share →: Daniel Craig leaving Bond to become Benoit Blanc is one of the best things to ever happen.

Commentary:
"From shaken, not stirred to southern detective drawl—Daniel Craig just can't resist a good mystery! 🕵️‍♂️🔍🍸 #From007toDubyaDubyaDubya"
2 months ago
Share →: Why read the room when you can leave the room?

Commentary:
"Reading rooms? Overrated. Exiting like a mystery novel? Now, that's some plot twist! 🚪😂📚"

For even more funny leaving quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny leaving quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1791 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

11,953

Funny Quotes Topics

14,758

Funny Quotes Images

11,953

3 minutes ago

3,442

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇻🇪 has bookmarked:

If you’re going through hell, keep going.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has viewed:

I come from a family of failed magicians. I have two half sisters.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has downloaded:

Turns out the honeymoon phase lasts forever when you pick the right partner.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has viewed:

Maybe her DMs haven’t been working for 2 months.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has viewed:

Life is pretty much just a series of awkward and embarrassing moments, separated by snacks.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has bookmarked:

Aliens only abduct the people that are already nuts so no one will believe them when they try and tell everyone.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has downloaded:

Sorry, I’m late. I got caught up at home being happy.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has downloaded:

I want to make fun of Kanye but I’m always losing my shit on the internet too.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has copied:

Don’t worry, I’m only dead inside from the waist up.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has shared:

Once again, I have fallen for life’s biggest scam: being two hours early for a flight only for security to take roughly seven minutes.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Twitch:

Having Twitter is just like reading the newspaper, except the newspaper is on fire and all the writers hate you.

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

Twitter is great because you can get good life advice from other emotionally unstable adults.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

That place is so crowded; nobody goes there anymore.

Broadcasted on X:

I hate to brag but I excel at my faults.

Spreading quickly via Discord:

The person who invented butter really understood humans.

Just landed via Slack:

If you have ever spent an hour on Twitter then you understand why there’s such an urgency to create Artificial Intelligence.

Making waves on TikTok:

All the best memories with my dad start with “Don’t tell your mom about this.”

Just landed via Pinterest:

If I was lying down and someone came up and gave me tons of kisses and smooshed my face, I’d love it. I don’t know what my cat’s problem is.

Spotted on Pinterest:

Microplastics are a waste of time. I go straight to eating whole packaging.

Just shared via Snapchat:

The great thing about having a mouse in your house is that I’m sure it’s just the one mouse, probably.

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