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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇰 has bookmarked:

They say time is the solution to every problem. I’ve been waiting for five hours already and the room is still messy.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has copied:

Growing your own tomatoes really is the best way to devote 3 months of your life to saving $2.17.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has copied:

Why would I take the high road when I could take the psychopath?

Someone from 🇶🇦 has bookmarked:

You want me to do Pilates? The thing that killed Jesus?

Someone from 🇹🇼 has copied:

I want the job where I push scared skydivers out of planes.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has viewed:

I wonder what the other me’s are up to in other dimensions.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has shared:

I wish every day had 30,000 hours, and that I had unlimited Adderall and was unemployed.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has copied:

I need a break from me.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has shared:

We all got a little Barbie in us (the microplastics).

Someone from 🇷🇴 has shared:

I feel so bad when I overtake an old person on the sidewalk. Like, man, I really didn’t mean to flex on you with my youthful stride.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

676 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Dec 31, 2025

3,658

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on WeChat:

My Native American name would be Smokes Cigarettes.

Making waves on Twitch:

Be nice to me, I may be hot one day.

Spotted on X:

I’m in favor of sticking an “out of order” sign on some people’s foreheads. As a warning.

Shared recently on Discord:

At least life has music.

Shared recently on Slack:

Disliking me is valid. I probably confronted you on your poor behavior, while everyone else just accepted it.

Just landed via Pinterest:

I’m not a very good poker player cause my eyes turn into big dollar signs when I see that I have a good hand.

Going viral on X:

Do married people watch Gen Z dating and feel like they caught the last chopper out of Nam?

Just landed via Facebook:

Of course I have critical thinking skills, I’m thinking critically of you right now.

Going viral on Threads:

Before the internet, going viral meant your drawing made it to the fridge, and your sibling was furious.

Trending via Telegram:

Sex before marriage is a sin unless you do it doggy style, because all dogs go to heaven. Follow me for more biblical loopholes.

111 Funny living quotes

Funny living quotes bring a splash of humor to everyday life, adding a sprinkle of laughter to your morning ☀️ and a chuckle before bed 🌜. These witty quips remind us not to take life too seriously 😄, offering a playful twist to mundane moments. Whether you’re in need of a giggle or just a fresh perspective 🤔, these gems promise to tickle your funny bone and brighten your day with a smile 😊.

New funny living quotes 👇

There must be an opposite of suicide, where someone suddenly and radically decides to start living, and rescues their own life from meaninglessness.

0

7 hours ago

decision, life, living, meaninglessness, opposite, own, rescue, someone, start, suicide, where
Single introverts be like, “If it’s meant to be, my future love will simply teleport into my living room.”

0

1 day ago

future, future love, humor, introvert, living, living room, love, meant, relationship, room, simply, single, teleport
Music just makes living on this earth a little bit more bearable.

0

3 weeks ago

bit, Earth, enjoyment, entertainment, humor, just, life, little, living, mood, music, survival
There are beautiful horny women (me) being forced into celibacy due to the utter lack of worthy men in existence. This is the world we are living in now.

0

3 weeks ago

beautiful, being, celibacy, dating, due, existence, forced, frustration, horny, humor, lack, life, living, man, me, men, modern, modern life, woman, women, world, worthy, worthy man
Some days you have breakfast for dinner and live life on your own terms.

0

3 weeks ago

breakfast, days, dinner, food, freedom, fun, humor, life, lifestyle, live, living, meal, own, terms
“I’m not concerned about Netflix buying Warner Brothers. None of this will matter once we evolve gills and start living underwater.”

0

3 weeks ago

brothers, buying, entertainment, entertainment industry, evolution, evolve, future, gill, humor, industry, living, matter, Netflix, none, once, start, underwater, warner, Warner Brothers
If we’re living in a dystopian nightmare, where the hell is my housekeeping robot?

0

1 month ago

dystopia, dystopian, future, hell, housekeeping, humor, living, nightmare, robot, technology, where
There is literally no rule that says you have to get married and start a family. Normalize splitting a mansion with your five best friends and ten dogs.

0

1 month ago

arrangement, best, dog, dogs, family, five, friend, friends, humor, lifestyle, literally, living, living arrangement, mansion, marriage, married, normalize, rule, start, ten
Some people are living bowel movement to bowel movement.

0

2 months ago

bowel, bowel movement, daily, daily routine, humor, life, living, movement, people, routine
Based on the amount of laundry I wash each week, I’m starting to think there are people who live here that I haven’t met yet.

0

2 months ago

amount, chore, funny observation, here, household, housemate, humor, i, laundry, live, living, living situation, met, mystery, observation, people, situation, starting, think, wash, washing, week

For even more funny living quotes, hit next 👇

All funny living quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

87 shares on Snapchat this month:

The most productive species of beaver is the Eager.

29 shares on Messenger this month:

It’s like 10,000 lies when all you need is the files.

51 shares on Facebook this month:

Tomorrow isn’t promised, so make sure you tell bad people they’re bad.

70 shares on YouTube this month:

I’m sorry if I seem weird, it’s because I am.

50 shares on Threads this month:

Normalize saying, “Just as the oracle foretold,” when things go your way.

45 shares on Discord this month:

I may join the cicadas this summer and just scream for six weeks straight.

36 shares on Messenger this month:

Relationship so bad you start relating to Taylor Swift songs.

48 shares on Reddit this month:

Desperately searching the dating app settings for an option to turn down the difficulty level.

94 shares on Reddit this month:

One day you’re young and fun, and the next thing you know, you’re staring out of a window for no reason.

45 shares on Pinterest this month:

After I get irritated, it takes me about 2 hours to fix my face.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Every app is a dating app if you are creepy enough.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Immediately de-escalating an international conflict by posting an angry looking selfie with the caption “Come on, guys.”

7 folks are currently checking 👀

A lot of men actually do forgive cheating, as long as their homies don’t know.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

I wish I could Shazam a perfume.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Wolves are just dogs that nobody has called a “good boy” yet.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Pronouncing hyperbole like guacamole.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Go ahead. Order anything you want. Money is no object when we dine at IKEA.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Getting to know someone these days is impossible. No one is really single, everyone has something going on, is hung up on their ex or is otherwise damaged in some way.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

(Talking to myself) I just don’t know what to tell you.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

What I lack in moves on the dance floor, I more than make up for in dancing around a conversation.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

676 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

4,045

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇭 has bookmarked:

Rudolph, with your nose so bright, help me find my phone tonight.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has bookmarked:

“Male loneliness epidemic” and it’s just karma and the consequences of their actions.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has downloaded:

“Hope this email finds you doing well!” The email found me, therefore I am unwell.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has copied:

I don’t like talking to people with an IQ lower than the room temperature.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has shared:

Feminism convinced women they could have it all. Now they’re 40, independent, and crying in a very nice but empty apartment.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has bookmarked:

If the line at the grocery store takes longer than 10 minutes, the candy beside the checkout should be free.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has copied:

I’m not totally useless. I can be used as a bad example.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has bookmarked:

The closest I’ve come to mastering a martial art is figuring out how to wash my feet in the shower.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has copied:

If anyone wants to contact me, from now on I can only be reached via my bank account.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has copied:

I have three kids. I should be terrified of sex.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

No one suddenly needs anything more than a kid whose mom has just sat down and gotten comfortable.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

There are more bots on here than in Star Wars.

Just landed via Twitch:

I want a chiropractor to crack my entire body like a glow stick.

Shared recently on Twitch:

Monday has a personal vendetta against my happiness.

Spotted on Reddit:

Drivers seem to underestimate how willing I am to get knocked down at a zebra crossing to prove a point.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Not now, babe, it’s my nightly phone enrichment time.

Going bananas on Instagram:

I don’t even know who’s famous anymore.

Making waves on Pinterest:

The awkward moment when someone’s zipper is down and you don’t know whether to tell them or not.

Shared recently on Slack:

Of course I talk to myself. Sometimes I need expert advice.

Seen just now on Telegram:

You should introduce your upper lip to your bottom lip sometime and shut up.

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