45 Funny month quotes

• This December is not Decembering like the other Decembers Decembered.

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  1 week ago

  December, holiday, humor, month, repetition, seasonal, time, wordplay

• I should be able to eat one huge meal a month, like a snake. This every-few-hours shit sucks.

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  1 week ago

  able, complaint, eat, eating, food, huge, humor, hunger, i, meal, month, shit, should, snake, sucks

• The most unrealistic part of Christmas movies isn’t the existence of Santa… it’s that all these people have, like, a month off work with no interruptions.

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  3 weeks ago

  break, Christmas, Christmas movie, existence, expectation, holiday, holiday break, holiday season, humor, interruption, interruptions, month, most, movie, people, Santa, season, time, time off, unrealistic, unrealistic expectation, work, work interruption

• After a month away and enough pasta to scare an Italian grandma, I can confirm: too much Parmesan? Never heard of her.

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  2 months ago

  after, away, cheese, confirm, enough, food, grandma, humor, i, italian, month, much, never, Parmesan, pasta, scare, too, travel

• Bank account nice and empty. Starting the new month on a clean slate.

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  2 months ago

  account, bank, bank account, budgeting, clean, clean slate, empty, finance, humor, money, month, new, new month, nice, slate, starting

• Carrying a baby for nine months and then naming it Chet is insane.

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  2 months ago

  baby, baby name, carrying, humor, insane, insanity, month, months, name, naming, nine, nine month, parenthood, pregnancy

• A month in Italy has halved my will to work and doubled my desire for money.

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  2 months ago

  desire, humor, Italy, money, month, motivation, travel, vacation, work

• Cooking your own meals really is the best way to devote 50 hours of your life every month to save $50.

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  2 months ago

  50, best, budget, cooking, every, food, hours, humor, irony, life, meal, meals, money, month, own, save, saving, time

• Ok, hear me out: a reality show where billionaire CEOs have to live off of their lowest-paid employees’ salaries for a month.

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  2 months ago

  billionaire, CEO, corporate, disparity, economic, economic disparity, employee, employee salary, employees, experiment, hear, humor, live, me, month, ok, reality, reality show, salary, satire, show, social, social experiment, where, workplace

• I hate starting new relationships. I gotta act like I ain’t crazy for two months.

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  2 months ago

  act, crazy, dating, hate, i, month, months, new, relationship, relationships, start

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