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30 Funny bar quotes

New funny bar quotes 👇

  • If you drink enough, any bar can be a karaoke bar.

    Commentary:
    “When the bartender starts looking like Simon Cowell, you know it’s time to hit the stage! 🎤🍻😂”

  • Just eating the emotional support snickers bar in my purse. How about you?

    Commentary:
    “Currently negotiating peace talks with my ‘crisis cookies’ 🍪😂 How’s the Snickers diplomacy going? 😜🍫”

  • Yeah, I work at the fart bar. Yup. I’m a fartender. Farts on me tonight!

    Commentary:
    “Just when I thought the bar scene couldn’t get any gassier! 🍻💨 #FartenderLife”

  • You should be able to google what someone said to you at the bar last night.

    Commentary:
    “Ah, the magical powers of Google, saving us from the ‘lost in translation’ moments from last night’s bar conversations 🍸🧐 Let’s just hope our Google searches don’t judge us too hard! 💬🔍”

  • There’s a disgusting pervert at the bar watching pornography over my shoulder.

    Commentary:
    Oh, dear! Looks like someone’s giving new meaning to the term “over-the-shoulder viewing.” 🤭🍸 Remember, folks, a little privacy goes a long way, especially when it comes to choosing what to watch over a cocktail! 😉📺 #BarEtiquetteGoneWrong

  • Everyone is all “love is patient” during the wedding, but when there’s a long line for the open bar, not so much.

    Commentary:
    “Love is patient, but a free bar test our patience faster than a wedding toast 🥂😅 #PrioritiesShiftWhenDrinksAreInvolved”

  • The gaps in my resume are from the space bar.

    Commentary:
    Sounds like someone’s resume is out of this world! 🚀🌌 It seems like the space bar had a mind of its own and decided to take a few breaks between words. Gaps in your resume? More like gaps in the galaxy! Who knew a tiny button could cause interstellar mayhem? 🌠🪐

  • My least controversial opinion is that IKEA should have a bar. I think we were meant to consume three beers and then purchase a Gjörfbunkle.

    Commentary:
    🍻 “Hear ye, hear ye! It’s time for the official unveiling of the ‘Tipsy Furnishing’ concept! Where meatballs and merriment meet flat-pack furniture – because who doesn’t want their Gjörfbunkle to come with a side of brewski wisdom? Cheers to the genius who knew the true path to assemble-y bliss!” 🛋️🍺

  • I like how “energy bars” are really just candy bars, and we all pretend to not notice.

    Commentary:
    “Who are we kidding? Those ‘energy bars’ are practically just candy in disguise! 🍫💪 Time to face the sweet reality and embrace the sugar rush in the name of ‘health’. 😂 #CandyBarConfessions”

  • The only thing I love more than an open mind is an open bar.

    Commentary:
    “Who needs an open mind when you can have an open bar? 🍹💡 Bottoms up for closed thoughts and open bottles! 🍻🧠 #Priorities”

For even more funny bar quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny bar quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

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