Funny quotes empty

24 Funny empty quotes

Feminism convinced women they could have it all. Now they’re 40, independent, and crying in a very nice but empty apartment.

1 week ago

I think we all need to go out into an empty field and just scream for about an hour.

2 weeks ago

I’ve never seen a Cybertruck with anyone in the passenger seat.

1 month ago

My wallet is empty, just like my soul.

1 month ago

You just can’t live a full life on an empty stomach.

1 month ago

My wife asked me why the bottle of wine we bought yesterday was half empty. I said because she is a pessimist.

1 month ago

Having an empty laundry basket is the best 5 seconds of my life.

1 month ago

Sitting next to you on an empty train and clicking my stopwatch every time you turn a page in your book.

3 months ago

Me: God, please stop giving me your toughest battles. God: You just have to empty the dishwasher.

3 months ago

Staring sadly at the empty ice cream bowl that’s too small for licking.

3 months ago

Can we all agree that Mini Cooper drivers need to put an extended flag on the back of their cars so the stalls where they’re parked stop looking empty?

3 months ago

I hate when my cat runs into my bedroom and hisses at an empty chair, then runs back out again; and I then have to fall asleep holding a crucifix.

3 months ago

Optimist: The glass is ½ full. Pessimist: The glass is ½ empty. Excel: The glass is January 2nd.

3 months ago

You’re an adult if you’re happy every time the mailbox is empty.

3 months ago

This is not an empty room, this is a very successful anti-party.

3 months ago

Never understood why people train their dogs to sit pretty or roll over when there are useful tricks like empty the dishwasher or fold the laundry.

3 months ago

The best part about Smarties is pouring them into an empty prescription bottle and shaking them all into my mouth while waiting in line.

3 months ago

After I drink coffee, I show my empty cup to the IT guy and say that I have successfully installed Java. He hates me.

3 months ago

You either have a full ketchup bottle in your house or an almost empty one. There’s no in-between.

3 months ago

No matter how old you are, when the kitchen roll is empty, you have a telescope.

3 months ago