73 Funny eye quotes

• Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.

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  7 hours ago

  beauty, beer, drinking, eye, holder, humor, perception, perspective

• My eye doctor is alarmingly young and when he said he thought I had a chalazion or a hordoleum, I thought he might be referencing Pokémon.

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  9 hours ago

  chalazion, doctor, eye, eye doctor, eye health, health, hordoleum, humor, medical, medical humor, Pokémon, young, young doctor

• If we ever make eye contact, just know I imagined way too much already.

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  16 hours ago

  awkward, contact, crush, ever, eye, eye contact, humor, i, imagination, interaction, just, know, much, social, social interaction, too

• My first instinct when I see an animal is to say “hello.” My first instinct when I see a person is to avoid eye contact and hope it goes away.

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  17 hours ago

  animal, anxiety, avoid, away, contact, eye, eye contact, greeting, hello, hope, humor, i, instinct, introvert, person, say, social, social anxiety

• Phone is a cigarette for eyes.

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  22 hours ago

  addiction, cigarette, eye, eyes, eyesight, humor, metaphor, phone, screen, screen time, technology, time

• I’ll make direct eye contact while eating a hot dog, just to make you feel weird.

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  1 day ago

  awkward, contact, direct, dog, eating, eye, eye contact, feel, hot, hot dog, humor, interaction, just, social, social interaction, weird, while

• Good morning to everyone who still believes what they see with their own two eyes.

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  1 week ago

  belief, everyone, eye, eyes, good, good morning, humor, morning, own, perception, reality, sarcasm, sight, still

• Twitter is cigarette for the eyes.

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  1 week ago

  addiction, cigarette, eye, eyes, humor, media, social, social media, Twitter

• This Dollar Tree energy drink has me seeing colors that aren’t available to the naked eye, yet.

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  3 weeks ago

  available, color, colors, dollar, Dollar Tree, drink, energy, energy drink, exaggeration, eye, hallucination, humor, me, naked, seeing, tree, vision

• No rizz, just pretty eyes and many unsettling things to say.

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  3 weeks ago

  awkwardness, eye, eyes, humor, just, no rizz, pretty, pretty eye, rizz, say, self-deprecating, thing, things, unsettling, unsettling thing

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