28 Funny funny activity quotes

• 

  4 days ago

  View →: Life hack: Confuse your doctor by putting on gloves at the same time he does.
• 

  1 week ago

  View →: Just burned 2,000 calories trying to avoid someone I know at Walmart.
• 

  4 weeks ago

  View →: When I like a song, I repeat it until the artist comes out and ask for water.
• 

  3 months ago

  View →: Every once in a while, I go outside and run the vacuum cleaner on the driveway, just to make sure the neighbors never talk to me.
• 

  3 months ago

  View →: Spent most of the day making sure my couch still works. So far so good.
• 

  4 months ago

  View →: Back in my day there was so much toilet paper and so much eggs that we gathered at night and threw them at the houses of our enemies.
• 

  4 months ago

  View →: I like to keep my wife guessing by walking around the backyard carrying a ladder and a chainsaw.
• 

  5 months ago

  View →: Cause of death: Trying to draw eyebrows on the neighbor’s cat.
• 

  5 months ago

  View →: have one of those big paintings with the eyeholes cut out, but I don’t have anyone to spy on, so I just watch TV through it.
• 

  5 months ago

  View →: Ouija boards are like unannounced phone calls for ghosts.
• 

  5 months ago

  View →: Need someone to feed me Doritos while I read, so I don’t mess up the pages. No weirdos.
• 

  5 months ago

  View →: Edging my house plants by putting them next to the window when it rains.
• 

  5 months ago

  View →: He died doing what he loved: trying to find out if gang members are ticklish.
• 

  5 months ago

  View →: I like to scan my backyard every hour with a high power flashlight to let my neighbors know I won’t tolerate any weirdness around here.
• 

  5 months ago

  View →: Gonna break into your house, toast all your bread and put it back in the bag.
• 

  5 months ago

  View →: Sitting next to you on an empty train and clicking my stopwatch every time you turn a page in your book.
• 

  5 months ago

  View →: Golf is a great way to learn all of the new curse words your subconscious has been cooking up in the lab.
• 

  5 months ago

  View →: Picking up women at the bar and then gently setting them down.
• 

  5 months ago

  View →: Just because you can connect to your neighbor’s bluetooth speaker and play ghost noises doesn’t mean you should.
• 

  5 months ago

  View →: It’s that time of year again where I go to random restaurants to tell random women, “So this is why you cancelled our date?”, while they’re out with their significant others.
• 

  5 months ago

  View →: I like listening to true crime podcasts while I clean my bathroom because I can pretend I’m destroying evidence.
• 

  5 months ago

  View →: Make every hug more interesting by mysteriously whispering, “the Dark Lord stands at the crossroads!”
• 

  5 months ago

  View →: Tai Chi is so crazy because it’s like throwing a slow motion tantrum.
• 

  5 months ago

  View →: I’ve jogged with my jogging pants about as often as I’ve rolled through the kitchen with kitchen roll.
• 

  5 months ago

  View →: I like to push myself out of my comfort zone by sometimes sitting on the other end of my sofa.
• 

  5 months ago

  View →: Not now, I’m busy doing tax crimes on my abacus.
• 

  5 months ago

  View →: Microdosing bungee jumping by bending over to pick up a hair tie.
• 

  5 months ago

  View →: I tried counting sheep so I can fall asleep but that got boring, so I started talking to the shepherd instead.

For even more funny funny activity quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny funny activity quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌