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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇷 has bookmarked:

Hey (with the intention of getting ice cream).

Someone from 🇸🇪 has copied:

If I were to “picture everybody in the room naked,” I would be stunned and in awe of the beauty and diversity of the human form before me. But thanks for the advice.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has bookmarked:

God: “Free will was a bad idea. I should have charged for it.”

Someone from 🇩🇴 has downloaded:

We all have needs. I need my wife to go run errands so I can swipe the last donut.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has downloaded:

Opening up to people is a scam. Don’t do it.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has bookmarked:

I never make the same mistake twice. I make it three four times, you know, just to be sure!

Someone from 🇷🇼 has viewed:

Don’t ruin a good sundress by wearing panties.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has viewed:

I invoiced my boss two extra hours for the dream I had about work last night. I’m considering that overtime.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has bookmarked:

Nothing refreshes my memory of what I need at the grocery store like coming home from the grocery store.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has copied:

My bear’s diarrhea problems are really starting to worry me. The vet says he’s getting better but he’s not out of the woods yet.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 20, 2026

Users Online

3,596

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Telegram:

All I want is to live well and to die in a manner so bizarre and gruesome it can only be described with a German word.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

It’s important to get out of the house every once and a while to remind yourself of why you don’t go out.

Shared recently on X:

Due to personal reasons, I’m evil now.

Going bananas on Pinterest:

If Facebook has taught us anything it’s that a lot of people aren’t quite ready for a spelling bee.

Spotted on Reddit:

Your call is really important to us but first enjoy this clarinet number for the next seventy five minutes.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

I really don’t get enough praise for someone who doesn’t need validation from others.

Shared recently on Twitch:

The fact that I have a lot of wine in the house proves that I don’t drink much. Otherwise the wine would be gone.

Just shared via Discord:

No longer praying on your downfall. I will be directly involved.

Just landed via Facebook:

My fondest childhood memory is being able to sleep through the entire night and waking up rested.

Making waves on WeChat:

Do y’all watch the results come or do you go to bed and wait to see what Democracy Claus left you in the morning?

88 Funny reaction quotes

More funny reaction quotes 👇

Many people love saying, “Get these away from me,” after eating a few chips.

2 months ago

after, away, chip, chips, craving, eating, food, humor, love, me, people, reaction, saying, snack
Every Jurassic Park movie should end with an insurance adjuster getting a phone call and immediately throwing up.

2 months ago

adjuster, call, comedy, dinosaur, disaster, end, every, getting, humor, insurance, insurance adjuster, jurassic, Jurassic Park, movie, park, phone, phone call, reaction, should, throwing
I don’t trust anyone who gets enraged over messed-up fast food orders.

2 months ago

anger, anyone, fast, fast food, food, food order, frustration, humor, i, order, over, personality, reaction, trust
Rage bait often works on me because I was already angry before I read that.

2 months ago

anger, angry, bait, before, frustration, humor, i, me, mood, rage, rage bait, reaction, read, works
Using my invisible hula hoop really freaks people out.

2 months ago

behavior, hoop, hula, hula hoop, humor, invisible, joke, people, playful, prank, reaction, silly, using, weird, weird behavior
Book reviews be like: “5 stars. I’m sobbing. I’m unwell. I haven’t eaten in 16 hours. Highly recommend.”

2 months ago

5, book, book review, eaten, eating, eating habit, emotional, emotional reaction, exaggeration, habit, hours, humor, i, rating, reaction, recommend, recommendation, review, reviews, stars, unwell
Going “Omgg, that’s crazy,” every time my coworkers talk until it’s time to go home.

2 months ago

conversation, coworker, coworkers, crazy, day, end, end of day, every, going, home, humor, office, reaction, talk, time, work
Someone at my job mentioned severance, and I was like, “Oh my God, I love that show,” and they said, “No, I’m about to get fired.”

2 months ago

fired, firing, God, humor, i, job, love, misunderstanding, oh, reaction, said, severance, show, someone, TV, TV Show, workplace
Ever read a post multiple times, still tilt your head and whisper, “What?!”

2 months ago

confusion, curiosity, ever, funny reaction, head, head tilt, humor, media, multiple, post, puzzled, questioning, reaction, read, social, social media, still, tilt, times, whisper
The first time people saw a train coming at them, they ran away in terror.

2 months ago

away, behavior, coming, early, early invention, fear, history, human, human behavior, innovation, invention, people, progress, ran, reaction, saw, surprise, time, train, transportation

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All funny reaction quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

42 shares on Messenger this month:

Vegans will look you dead in the eye and tell you cauliflower tastes like ribs.

38 shares on WeChat this month:

I never make the same mistake twice. I make it three four times, you know, just to be sure!

33 shares on Telegram this month:

It’s so embarrassing when you make a silly face at a baby, and they do not care at all.

17 shares on Threads this month:

“Seize the day!” No thank you. I will leave the day alone and hope it extends me the same courtesy.

26 shares on Threads this month:

What base is it when you’re flirting with a woman, and she asks, “Are you all right”?

60 shares on TikTok this month:

I hope this out-of-office message finds you well.

48 shares on Telegram this month:

Apparently, stress balls are not supposed to be thrown at people who are stressing you out.

70 shares on Discord this month:

Today’s the day I’m gonna’ make the onions cry.

23 shares on YouTube this month:

Note to self: Very important! First hang up, then insult.

57 shares on Facebook this month:

Newborns cry because they’re being evicted.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇿 has shared:

Seeking a date so intense even the candles are sweating.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has viewed:

Wouldn’t it be nice if you could donate your own body fat to those who need it more urgently?

Someone from 🇹🇩 has shared:

Self-discipline is tough because I’m the boss of me, and that guy runs a real loose ship.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has downloaded:

Someone yelled “hey, retard!” and I looked back.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has shared:

I’ve heard that people who don’t have Facebook use their free time to lie naked on top of each other. Ew, imagine that.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has downloaded:

Not to brag but I can chop an onion without crying. And I can cry without chopping an onion.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has copied:

Well, it took several decades, but I might have finally run out of things to say.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has copied:

Has someone told the whales that they can’t sing?

Someone from 🇩🇯 has viewed:

Tech enthusiasts: My entire house is smart. Tech workers: The only piece of technology in my house is a printer, and I keep a gun next to it so I can shoot it if it makes a noise I don’t recognize.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has copied:

“I’m not dramatic. I just react with the intensity of a Shakespearean widow at all times.”

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Reddit:

To whoever stole my oversized clock, you owe me big time.

Seen just now on Twitch:

I like when I walk with people and they note that I’m a fast walker. We’re in a race. We’re in a race and you’re losing actually.

Trending via Discord:

Are you ever so happy to be in bed, you wish you could be even more in bed than you already are?

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Fact: WhatsApp is the most boring app if you’re single.

Seen just now on X:

Today marks a five year anniversary of how I’ll start going to the gym tomorrow.

Going viral on YouTube:

I have browser tabs open that are older than you.

Spotted on Twitch:

“I’m not concerned about Netflix buying Warner Brothers. None of this will matter once we evolve gills and start living underwater.”

Trending via TikTok:

My cat runs a secret cult. I just pay the rent.

Going viral on TikTok:

My psych professor asked if we’d heard of Pavlov. I said, “It rings a bell.” No one laughed; I’m too witty for this class.

Just landed via Facebook:

Everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about. Make it worse by saying they look tired.

Activity Log ✨

88 Funny reaction quotes

More funny reaction quotes 👇

All funny reaction quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨