23 Funny zero quotes

• It’s messed up that there are a million songs about love, but zero about hopping on a quick call with key stakeholders.

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  4 weeks ago

  call, communication, humor, irony, key, life, love, million, quick, song, songs, stakeholder, work, work life, zero

• I got Botox, and I asked the doctor, “How many years younger will this make me look?” and he was like, “Zero. You’ll just look like the other girls your age who have also gotten Botox.”

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  4 weeks ago

  age, asked, beauty, beauty treatment, Botox, cosmetic, cosmetic procedure, doctor, girls, got, humor, i, joke, just, look younger, me, procedure, skincare, treatment, younger, zero

• There is a grave concern that this post will produce zero likes.

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  4 weeks ago

  concern, engagement, grave, humor, irony, likes, media, post, produce, social, social media, zero

• My father didn’t want kids, so he had two kids, which was the equivalent of zero kids at the time.

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  4 weeks ago

  child, equivalent, family, father, humor, joke, kid, kids, parenting, sibling, time, want, zero

• The walk of shame, except it’s me at a bowling alley walking back to sit down after I knock down zero pins with bumpers.

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  4 weeks ago

  after, alley, back, bowling, bowling alley, bumper, embarrassment, except, game, humor, i, knock, me, pin, shame, sit, walk, walk of shame, walking, zero, zero pin

• I don’t want to sleep like a baby, I want to sleep like a cat. 14 hours, no responsibilities, zero regrets.

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  4 weeks ago

  14, animal, baby, cat, hours, humor, i, nap, regret, regrets, responsibility, rest, sleep, want, zero

• Remember, guys, it costs zero dollars to be annoying to strangers on the internet.

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  4 weeks ago

  annoyance, annoying, behavior, comedy, cost-free, costs, digital, digital interaction, dollars, guys, humor, interaction, internet, online, online behavior, remember, strangers, zero

• The zero likes won’t stop me from posting. I will talk to myself if I have to.

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  4 weeks ago

  confidence, humor, i, independence, likes, me, media, motivation, myself, online, online posting, persistence, posting, self-expression, social, social media, stop, talk, zero

• I had zero respect for my boss until he started appearing exclusively by hologram.

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  4 weeks ago

  appearing, boss, hologram, humor, i, joke, respect, technology, workplace, zero

• That one person who has zero concept of what an indoor voice is.

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  4 weeks ago

  behavior, concept, humor, indoor, indoor voice, loud, noise, person, personality, social, voice, zero

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