57 Funny check quotes

• If you stand too close to me in the check out line, you may as well pay for my stuff while you’re breathing down my neck.

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  1 month ago

  awkward, awkward situation, breathing, check, checkout, checkout line, close, humor, interaction, line, me, neck, pay, personal, personal space, sarcasm, shopping, situation, social, social interaction, space, stand, stuff, too, well

• Driving to work, and I just reached down to touch my leg to make sure I have pants on.

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  1 month ago

  check, driving, everyday, everyday life, humor, i, just, leg, life, pants, sure, touch, work

• Some of us better hope Santa doesn’t check social media, because if he does, all we’re getting for Christmas is therapy.

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  1 month ago

  better, check, Christmas, getting, gift, holiday, hope, humor, list, media, naughty, Santa, social, social media, therapy, us, wish, wish list

• Don’t check on your introverted friends this time of year. They’re probably turning their lights off and pretending they’re not home.

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  1 month ago

  anxiety, check, friends, holiday, home, humor, introvert, isolation, lights, pretending, social, social anxiety, time, turning, year

• One day my kids will move out and discover the dishes don’t clean themselves and I feel for them. I really do.

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  1 month ago

  check, clean, cleaning, day, discover, dishes, domestic, domestic life, feel, humor, i, kids, life, move, move out, parenting, reality, reality check, responsibility

• I don’t even check my bank account no more. I just swipe my card and if it’s god’s will, money will be debited.

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  1 month ago

  account, attitude, bank, bank account, card, carefree, carefree attitude, check, even, financial, financial struggle, god’s will, gods, humor, i, just, money, spending, struggle, swipe, swipe card

• I miss being able to study with complete focus for hours. Now I read one sentence and check my phone to see if penguins have legs or just feet.

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  1 month ago

  able, attention, attention span, being, check, complete, curiosity, distraction, feet, focus, hours, i, just, legs, miss, penguin, phone, procrastination, read, reading, sentence, span, study

• Don’t ring my doorbell unless you’re accompanied by a camera crew and holding balloons and a big check.

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  1 month ago

  balloons, big, big check, camera, camera crew, check, crew, doorbell, expectations, funny request, holding, humor, request, ring, surprise

• My reality check bounced, guess I’ll have to stay insane for the time being.

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  1 month ago

  being, bounced, check, guess, health, humor, insane, mental, mental health, perspective, reality, reality check, sarcasm, stay, time

• You’ll be having a good day and then someone your age says they’re buying a house.

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  1 month ago

  adulthood, age, buying, check, day, good, good day, having, house, humor, reality, reality check, someone

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