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57 Funny everyday quotes

New funny everyday quotes 👇

  • I need a leaf blower, but for people.

    Commentary:
    “Just imagine clearing crowds like autumn leaves – ‘Sorry, folks, the wind’s really picking up today!’ 🍃😄🍂”

  • You ever get surprised by your own recurring issues? Like, come on man, I thought we were past this.

    Commentary:
    “Thought I’d left that drama back in ‘don’t we know better by now?’ 🙄😂🎢”

  • Me pulling into a full parking lot: Don’t these people have homes?

    …

    Commentary:
    “Oh great, the parking lot is hosting a reunion and my car wasn’t invited! 🚗🙄🎉”

  • One of the biggest struggles of being an adult is deciding what to make for supper. Every. Single. Night.

    Commentary:
    “Sometimes I just want a dinner fairy to appear and say ‘Tacos it is!’ 🌮✨ #AdultingStruggles #SendHelp”

  • She’s probably just not using her phone right now for the first time ever in her whole life.

    Commentary:
    “Quick, someone call Ripley’s Believe It or Not! 😆📵📱”

  • Everybody looks like a criminal on the self-checkout camera.

    Commentary:
    “Every time I see myself on the self-checkout camera, I wonder if they expect me to steal some self-confidence! 😂🛒 #CaughtLookingSuspicious”

  • Life is so exciting. I was in my bedroom and now I’m in the living room. Who knows where I’ll go next.

    Commentary:
    “Next stop: The kitchen, for my epic snacking adventure! 🚪➡️🍿😄”

  • Getting mad when an app updates and changes their format is the new “rearranged grocery store” for me.

    Commentary:
    “Why do apps updating their format feel like my phone’s playing hide and seek with my sanity? 🤯📱🔄”

  • Making eye contact with strangers on the sidewalk and saying “it’s crazy that they just let me walk around, haha”.

    Commentary:
    “Suddenly, it’s a sidewalk stand-up show! 😂👀 #FreelanceComedian”

  • You ever spend the day with a skinny person and are like “ohhhh, that’s why you’re skinny”.

    Commentary:
    “When you realize their secret is saying no to fries while my secret is… extra fries 😂🍟 #Oops”

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