51 Funny public quotes

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  2 months ago

  Share →: Public urination isn’t a crime if you do it in your pants.

  …

  Commentary:
  "Guess that's one way to keep your options open! 😅🚽👖"

• 

  2 months ago

  Share →: I don’t know who needs to hear this, but if you talk on speakerphone in public, everyone around you hates you.

  …

  Commentary:
  "Public speaker (phone) of the year goes to… no one! 🙉📢🚫😂"

• 

  2 months ago

  Share →: I hate when kids scream in public. You don’t have real problems. It should be me screaming.

  Commentary:
  "Right?! If only adulting came with scream breaks. 🙃🎉😱"

• 

  2 months ago

  Share →: Remember, you don’t have to worry about being around annoying people in public if you never leave the house.

  Commentary:
  "Who knew being a homebody was actually an advanced social strategy? 😂🏠 #WinningAtIntroversion"

• 

  3 months ago

  Share →: When I become president, any public holiday that falls on a Thursday automatically extends to Friday.

  Commentary:
  Looks like when I’m president, Thursdays are getting a promotion! 🗳️🎉 Who needs a weekend when you can have a double day off? 😎🇺🇸 Let’s make “Thursday extensions” the new national policy—because everyone deserves a little extra weekend magic! ✨🛌

• 

  3 months ago

  Share →: I can’t decide if people who wear pajamas in public have given up on life or are living it to the fullest.

  Commentary:
  Ah, the timeless pajamas dilemma—are they embracing comfort or just waving the white flag of adulthood? 😴🛌 Either way, they’ve nailed the art of living life on their own cozy terms! 😂✨ Remember, sometimes the best fashion statement is a good laugh and a fuzzy onesie. 🎉🦄

• 

  3 months ago

  Share →: When it rains in New York, the train starts smelling like hamster.

  Commentary:
  Ah, the sweet aroma of New York hamster train tracks mingling with the refreshing scent of rain 🐹🌧️ Who knew urban transportation could be so gourmet? Just the perfect blend of city funk and pet shop chic!

• 

  3 months ago

  Share →: Twitter is like talking to yourself in public and some random dude walking by agrees with you.

  Commentary:
  "Twitter: where you can have a full-blown conversation with yourself and suddenly find a whole cheer squad of random strangers joining in 🤪👏 #EchoChamber"

• 

  3 months ago

  Share →: “Stalking”. God forbid I have access to public information and know how to utilize my resources.

  Commentary:
  "Oh, you mean 'advanced social media research' 😉🔍 Just call me a tech-savvy Sherlock Holmes! 🕵️‍♂️ #ProfessionalStalker"

• 

  3 months ago

  Share →: Being complimented by a girl in public is like getting kissed by an angel.

  Commentary:
  "Being complimented by a girl in public feels like you've won the approval of the universe! 👼💖 It's basically the equivalent of having a choir of angels sing your praises… or getting a high-five from Cupid himself! 😇💘"

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