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10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇭🇳 has downloaded:

You tell people you’re not trying to drink and they act like you just turned down 100k.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has viewed:

Listen to the birds, not the news.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has shared:

Brave of you to assume you can resist my good looks.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has shared:

Next time I feel incompetent at my job, I hope I remember that someone once pushed a live software update that crashed half the planet.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has copied:

People on diet aren’t mad at you. They’re mad at their lunch.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has downloaded:

Day number 3 without coffee: Lost hearing in my left eye.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has downloaded:

One day you’re hip and cool, and then out of nowhere you say things like hip and cool.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has copied:

There’s a reason we say cheese and not salad when we have to smile for a photo.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has shared:

If you need time alone, just announce that you need help cleaning the cats litter box.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has bookmarked:

Normalize talking to people in the gym who have earbuds in, they love that.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

831 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,993

Funny Quotes Topics

13,936

Funny Quotes Images

10,993

Updated

6 hours ago

Users Online

3,439

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on X:

I don’t know who needs to hear this, but you don’t need anything from Amazon today.

Going viral on Reddit:

The invention of locks was a key turning point in history.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

Patience is something you admire in the driver behind you, but not in the one ahead.

Spotted on Threads:

Starting the second half of your sandwich is like “hell yeah, baby, let’s run it back!”

Just landed via X:

So I got a call from a telemarketer, and he said he couldn’t understand me. I told him, “Press 1 for English.”

Reported on WhatsApp:

Women are like apples; I like biting them.

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

Life is short. Smile while you still have teeth.

Seen just now on YouTube:

Watching women’s tennis and getting angry at the net. We shouldn’t put needless obstacles in the way of women.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

Farmers markets should be for vegetables — not for millennials unloading their failed Etsy-store arts and crafts.

Trending via Threads:

I would rather lose you than the argument.

Home » Funny Self-awareness Quotes » Page 6

190 Funny self-awareness quotes

More funny self-awareness quotes 👇

2 months ago
Share →: Hey, sorry I acted weird the other day. I was trying so hard to act normal that it backfired.

…

Commentary:
"Trying to be normal is my superpower, but I must have left my cape at home! 🦸‍♂️😜😂"
2 months ago
Share →: I’m letting go of all earthly attachment — exactly like Buddha, except for the things I like and want.

Commentary:
"Achieving spiritual enlightenment one shopping spree at a time! 🛍️🧘‍♂️😂"
2 months ago
Share →: I don’t have a five-year plan because every two years I realize I need a different life.

Commentary:
"Five-year plan? I'm more of a 'five-minute snack break' kind of planner! 📝😂🍕"
2 months ago
Share →: Before you try to save someone, make sure you’re not interrupting their karma.

Commentary:
“Make sure you’ve got your karma GPS on! 🚴‍♂️💫 #PlotTwistGuard”
2 months ago
Share →: I knew I had issues when motivational speakers started to irritate me.

Commentary:
"When life gives you lemons, just tell the motivational speaker to keep them. 🍋🙉 #MotivationImmunity"
2 months ago
Share →: “Do it scared!” Thanks, but I have done everything scared. When is it my turn to do it calm?

Commentary:
Haha, same here! Can I get a “calm” pass, please? 😂🙈🧘‍♀️
2 months ago
Share →: Sometimes I wish I had a speed bump between my brain and my mouth.

Commentary:
"With my track record, I'd need a whole traffic management system 🤯🛑🚗💬"
2 months ago
Share →: I be like, “Who’s praying on my downfall?” as if I don’t make self-destructive life decisions.

Commentary:
"When the real enemy is the man in the mirror 😂🤦‍♂️ #TeamSelfSabotage" 💥🔄
2 months ago
Share →: I’m afraid to go to therapy — what if they fix me and I lose my funny?

Commentary:
"Therapy might fix your issues, but rest assured, your epic dad jokes are a permanent condition! 😅🛋️😂"
2 months ago
Share →: I even procrastinate things I actually want to do.

Commentary:
"Why do today what you can put off until tomorrow… or next week… or, eh, maybe never? 😅⏳ #ProLevelProcrastination"

For even more funny self-awareness quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny self-awareness quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

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Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇦 has copied:

Some people’s laughs are funnier than the joke.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has bookmarked:

Life hack: Allow yourself 8–12 hours of alone time every morning to prepare for the day.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has copied:

I like to do a task by worrying about it for three weeks and then finally dedicating 10 solid minutes to completing it.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has bookmarked:

If you have children, you can experience all human emotions before 9 a.m. on Sundays.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has copied:

If I’d married a wealthier man, I’d be lying on a fancier couch right now refusing to clean bigger rooms.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has downloaded:

One minute you’re young and fun and the next, you need a tow out of a beanbag chair.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has downloaded:

80 years ago we would have all been institutionalized and I think that’s beautiful.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has downloaded:

I had 99 problems but getting divorced solved 98 of them.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has copied:

For a guy with no reflection, Dracula’s eyeliner is always flawless.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has shared:

Which is it, brain? Does nothing matter or do I need to be anxious about everything?

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

If you did the weekend right, your coffee needs coffee today.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

Since the beginning of time itself, people have been wondering, what the hell is going on?

Seen just now on Threads:

I’m very loyal to whatever brand is on sale.

Breaking via YouTube:

You can’t spell crypto without “cry”.

Going viral on Threads:

Laundry has to be the most sinister chore. Always waiting, always lurking.

Just landed via Threads:

Trying to be cute today but my face isn’t cooperating.

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

Whoever named the grapefruit when there was already a fruit named grape. Incompetent legend. I wish we could hang out.

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

“Why don’t you tell us anything anymore?” I’ve updated my privacy policy.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

One thing I love about the internet is seeing some of the most hateful people posting inspirational quotes.

Seen just now on Slack:

Remember when we were young and said “I’ll sleep when i’m older”? Well, now we can’t when we want to.

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Activity Log ✨

190 Funny self-awareness quotes

More funny self-awareness quotes 👇

For even more funny self-awareness quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny self-awareness quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Mario Kart gave me unrealistic expectations of how banana peels affect traffic.

Can’t wait to get past this phase of my life. I need to see what all of this was for.

My daughter’s morning alarm is less to wake her up, and more to warn the rest of us.

“Dating pool” is incredibly optimistic. More like dating drainage.

I think the worst part about the collapse of civilization will be all those people with no way to remove their braces.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

I put the mess in domestic.

There is no sex. I lied. You are gonna lay here and take personality quizzes with me.

It’s so crazy how people are never down to just go get a burger. It didn’t used to be like this.

A college education is one of the few things a person is willing to pay for and not get.

I’m very loyal to whatever brand is on sale.

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Every day when I get home, I thank my cats for allowing me to live in their house.

Relationship status: my last pickpocket had really gentle hands.

Well, maybe grass should touch me for once. How about that?

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

A police lineup, but you have to recognize your dad’s sneeze.

Needing to stretch is so funny. Your body is like “Ughhh, make me longer!”

Just walked by an empath and his head exploded.

Why did they call it painting your toenails and not graffeeti?

When fireworks were invented, it was ‘hisssss’ to ‘wheeeee’ in the making.

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