61 Funny commentary quotes

• “There’s a reason religion tells you your reward is after death; it keeps you quiet while you’re being exploited alive.”

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  5 days ago

  after, alive, being, belief, commentary, death, exploitation, humor, keeps, life, quiet, reason, religion, reward, silence, social, social commentary, while

• I can’t wait for the “international law” crowd to discover that “human rights” aren’t real, either.

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  5 days ago

  commentary, crowd, discover, human, human right, humor, i, international, international law, irony, law, politics, real, right, rights, skepticism, social, social commentary, wait

• People in 1999 were using the Internet as an escape from reality. People today are using reality as an escape from the Internet.

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  5 days ago

  1999, age, commentary, digital, digital age, escape, humor, internet, people, reality, social, social commentary, technology, today, using

• I suppose someone has to do all the consuming and obeying.

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  5 days ago

  commentary, consuming, humor, i, obeying, sarcasm, social, social commentary, someone

• Libraries were a good start, but we need more places where people can’t talk.

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  6 days ago

  commentary, conversation, good, humor, library, need, people, place, places, quiet, quiet place, silence, social, social commentary, start, talk, where

• I feel like this holiday season, it’s important to remind people of the true meaning of Christmas: ghosts terrorizing rich people in the middle of the night until they agree to pay their employees more.

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  6 days ago

  agree, Christmas, commentary, employee, employees, feel, ghost, ghosts, holiday, holiday season, humor, i, important, meaning, middle, night, pay, pay raise, people, person, raise, remind, rich, rich person, season, social, social commentary, true

• Straight man stuns they/them by ordering in fluent woke.

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  6 days ago

  commentary, communication, fluent, humor, identity, language, man, ordering, social, social commentary, straight, straight man, they/them, woke, woke language

• When I get married, I want my wedding video to be filmed like it’s an episode of The Office. I want camera zooms, eye contact, side commentary— all of it.

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  6 days ago

  camera, camera zoom, commentary, contact, episode, eye, eye contact, humor, i, marriage, married, office, side, style, The Office, video, video style, want, wedding, wedding video, Zoom

• We’ve been talking about eating the rich for so long, they got over-ripe.

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  6 days ago

  commentary, eating, got, humor, metaphor, overripe, rich, social, social commentary, talking

• It would be nice to see basic human decency make a comeback.

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  7 days ago

  basic, comeback, commentary, decency, human, human decency, humor, kindness, nice, social, social commentary

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