Home » Funny Complete Quotes

11 Funny complete quotes

Trending Funny Complete Quotes 🔥

I was at a funeral yesterday and spiced things up by walking over to complete strangers and saying “Ignore what everyone else thinks. I, personally, have no issue with you being here”.
I just come here for the free life advice and inspirational quotes from people who’s lives are complete train wrecks.
In a job interview, you can always respond to an awkward question with a deep gaze and parted lips, followed by “You complete me.”
Fog. When nature is too lazy to load the complete environment.
HR: “Please complete our anonymous survey.” My boss then later: “Don’t forget the survey, HR said you are the last one from our team.”

New funny complete quotes 👇

3 months ago
Share →: It took three employees to help me complete “self-checkout” yesterday.

Commentary:
Oh, the irony of self-checkout! 🤷‍♂️ Clearly, they misunderstood the concept of "self" in self-checkout. Maybe they thought it meant "staff-assisted" checkout instead! 🤣 #TeamworkMakesTheDreamWork
3 months ago
Share →: Deodorant? No, I never need to buy any. People just give it to me. Complete strangers sometimes.

Commentary:
"Who needs to buy deodorant when you have a magical aura that makes people want to gift it to you? 😂✨ Talk about spreading good vibes – and good scents – wherever you go! 🎁🌸#DeodorizeMePlease"
4 months ago
Share →: In a job interview, you can always respond to an awkward question with a deep gaze and parted lips, followed by “You complete me.”

Commentary:
"Ah, the age-old job interview strategy: when in doubt, just channel your inner Jerry Maguire and profess your undying love for the interviewer. Who needs qualifications when you have romance on your side, right?"
5 months ago
Share →: If you don’t like sports, you are missing a whole world of easy-going conversations with complete strangers.

Commentary:
"Oh, you don't like sports? You're missing out on all the opportunities to bond with strangers over the pain of your favorite team losing! 🤣🏈 Don't worry, we can still chat about the weather or complain about Mondays instead! ☀️😩"
5 months ago
Share →: I miss being able to study with complete focus for hours. Now I read one sentence and check my phone to see if penguins have legs or just feet.

Commentary:
"Ah, the evolution of study habits in the digital age: from deep concentration to existential penguin ponderings 🐧📚 Stay strong, dear student! Who knows, perhaps those penguins are onto something fascinating! #FocusVsFeathers"
5 months ago
Share →: I just come here for the free life advice and inspirational quotes from people who’s lives are complete train wrecks.

Commentary:
"Ah, the perfect blend of wisdom and chaos 🚂💥 Who needs a life coach when you can just hang out with these 'train wreck experts' for some entertaining life lessons? 🤪🤷‍♂️"
5 months ago
Share →: A Jackie Chan fight scene where he’s in an IKEA warehouse and he fights off dudes with furniture pieces, but by the end he’s accidentally assembled it all into a complete Malm bedroom set.

Commentary:
🤣👊💥 Imagine Jackie Chan turning an IKEA warehouse into the ultimate battleground, dodging attacks with a Billy bookcase and swinging a Lack table like a pro! And after a whirlwind of chaos, he emerges victorious with a fully assembled Malm bedroom set – now that's some next-level flat-pack martial arts mastery! 🛋️🛏️🔧
5 months ago
Share →: I was at a funeral yesterday and spiced things up by walking over to complete strangers and saying “Ignore what everyone else thinks. I, personally, have no issue with you being here”.

Commentary:
"Nothing like livening up a funeral with some scandalous support 😏🙊 Who says funerals have to be a somber affair? Adding a sprinkle of awkwardness and confusion sure makes for a memorable event! 🌶️ #BreakingFuneralEtiquette"
5 months ago
Share →: HR: “Please complete our anonymous survey.” My boss then later: “Don’t forget the survey, HR said you are the last one from our team.”

Commentary:
🤦‍♂️ "Ah, the classic 'anonymous' survey – HR's way of finding out who has the best handwriting in the office! And of course, nothing says 'anonymous' quite like your boss singling you out as the last one to complete it. Smooth move, HR, real smooth. 📝😂"
5 months ago
Share →: I hope the world needs to be saved from the apocalypse with video game skills so my teen’s entire life won’t have been a complete waste.

Commentary:
"Looks like it's game over for the end of the world, folks! 🎮🌍 Who knew all those hours of gaming practice would finally pay off? At least now your teen can proudly say their joystick skills aren't just for show! 😅🕹️ #SavingTheWorldOneLevelAtATime"