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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇬 has shared:

Your password must contain a character… with a tragic backstory.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has downloaded:

You wish you had this many chins.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has bookmarked:

Horoscope: Many good things are in store for you! Unfortunately, the store is closed for repairs.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has shared:

If your boyfriend insists he rolls everywhere because it’s ‘faster than walking’, you may be dating a gamer.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has viewed:

If paying a cashier a living wage will make prices go up, why doesn’t replacing cashiers with self-checkouts make prices go down?

Someone from 🇹🇿 has downloaded:

Receipts are like: Take this tiny piece of paper home with you and throw it away.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has copied:

My new drivers license arrived and when I opened it, I gasped. How’d they get a picture of my mother?

Someone from 🇸🇿 has copied:

Sometimes there is no way to debug besides staring at the code until you become enlightened.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has downloaded:

This going into the office stuff blows. Like, I seriously have to wear clothes now.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has bookmarked:

You are the wind beneath my overly sensitive, motion-activated floodlight.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Feb 3, 2026

3,531

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Reddit:

Dating is just wondering why someone is single and then slowly figuring it out.

Spotted on WeChat:

If you wish me a happy Thanksgiving, don’t be surprised if I whip out a ziplock bag and ask you to bring me home some leftovers.

Shared recently on Twitch:

All my passwords are protected by short term memory loss.

Spotted on Twitch:

The best part of having a failing memory is that you can wrap up presents for yourself, and when it comes time to open them, you are honestly surprised.

Live now on WeChat:

I remember sex. That was cool.

Breaking via Reddit:

Being friends with introverts is hard sometimes. Did they die? Are they just recharging? Are they Batman now? The suspense is killing me.

Making waves on Reddit:

Sometimes a man’s purpose is to simply remind you again and again that you’d be just fine on your own.

Going bananas on Instagram:

I think every app should, by law, let you deactivate all of its short-form video content.

Broadcasted on WeChat:

Always be kind. You never know who might own a jacuzzi.

Breaking via WeChat:

Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.

116 Funny hope quotes

Funny hope quotes add a lighthearted twist to our most optimistic moments — especially when things don’t go quite as planned! 😂🌈 Whether it’s hoping for a productive day but ending up in pajamas by 2 p.m., or putting all your hope in coffee to solve life’s problems, these quotes remind us that hope is powerful — and often pretty hilarious. Because when all else fails… at least we can laugh! 😆☕✨

New funny hope quotes 👇

The Face ID on my phone won’t work until it sees the loss of hope in my eyes.

1 week ago

eyes, face, Face ID, frustration, hope, humor, ID, loss, loss of hope, phone, technology, work
I hope my parents feel proud. They scared me so bad about getting pregnant as a teenager that now they’re never getting grandkids.

1 week ago

bad, family, fear, feel, getting, grandkid, grandkids, hope, humor, i, me, never, parent, parenting, parents, pregnancy, pregnant, proud, scare, scare tactic, scared, tactic, teenager
I really miss kissing. I hope next year favors my lips.

1 week ago

hope, humor, i, kiss, kissing, lips, longing, miss, missing, next, relationship, romantic, wish, year
What did people do before alarm clocks? Just go to bed like, “Hope I wake up in time for work tomorrow.”

1 week ago

alarm, alarm clock, bed, bedtime, before, clock, clocks, hope, humor, i, just, morning, morning routine, people, routine, sleep, time, tomorrow, wake, waking, waking up, work
I lied, I’m jealous. I hope every girl who looks at you gets clipped by a meteor.

1 week ago

every, girl, hope, humor, i, insult, jealous, jealousy, jealousy humor, jealousy joke, joke, looks, meteor, relationship, relationship humor
I’m not mad, I just hope your socks slide off in your shoe all day.

1 week ago

aggression, anger, annoyance, day, discomfort, hope, humor, i, just, mad, passive, passive aggression, shoe, slide, sock, socks
My favorite conspiracy theory is that everything is going to be OK.

1 week ago

conspiracy, conspiracy theory, everything, favorite, going, hope, humor, ok, optimism, reassurance, theory
I hope one day I will sleep before midnight like normal humans do. Every day I sleep tomorrow, even yesterday I slept today.

1 week ago

bedtime, before, day, even, every, hope, human, humans, humor, i, insomnia, management, midnight, normal, normal human, procrastination, sleep, time, time management, today, tomorrow, yesterday
Nothing hits harder than opening the fridge for the fifth time, hoping new food magically appeared.

1 week ago

disappointment, fifth, food, fridge, harder, hope, hoping, humor, hunger, kitchen, magic, new, nothing, opening, snack, time
I hope the next time you’re stressed, it’s because you’re choosing between Japan, Bali, Switzerland, or the Maldives.

1 week ago

Bali, choice, destination, hope, i, Japan, luxury, Maldif, next, stress, Switzerland, time, travel, vacation

For even more funny hope quotes, hit next 👇

All funny hope quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

92 shares on Snapchat this month:

Even Hotmail is hotter than me.

10 shares on Snapchat this month:

Lingerie under a trench coat is still on my bucket list, by the way.

11 shares on Snapchat this month:

“We will go ahead and make these changes if we don’t hear from you before Friday” is such an elegant way to solve problems.

89 shares on Facebook this month:

If I text you at 8:10, you’re supposed to reply at 8:09.

23 shares on Threads this month:

Absolutely no reason for a single guy to be in a sunflower field. Get out of there, pervert!

98 shares on Discord this month:

I let people skate. I never mention the ice is thin.

92 shares on Messenger this month:

Sure, money can’t buy happiness, but it can definitely buy a jet ski… and have you ever seen a sad person on a jet ski?

79 shares on WeChat this month:

According to this box of macaroni and cheese, I am an entire family.

21 shares on Threads this month:

A little mystery is the sweetest seduction.

96 shares on Threads this month:

If you ever need me, I’m always just a couple missed calls and text messages away.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

24 folks are currently checking 👀

There is no ‘we’ in ‘food’.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Just in case you don’t know, it’s “piqued” your interest, not “peaked”.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Everyone’s a gangster until they turn a spoon the wrong way under running water.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

I said it was my favorite show, I didn’t say it was good.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

No, I don’t want to read the article first, I want to argue now.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

My wife refuses to hire a housekeeper because she doesn’t want them to see this mess.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Saw a girl in a Franz Ferdinand T-shirt. She couldn’t even name three other main causes of the outbreak of World War I.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

My cat, who has no job and pays no rent, is apparently unhappy with his fancy new cat food, and I, for some reason, am currently on my way back to the store to rectify the matter.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

How you conduct yourself when using plastic wrap is the real you.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Filling animals with helium is kinda weird, but whatever floats your goat.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,584

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇷 has shared:

Toddlers negotiate like tiny mob bosses: it’s the hard way or the harder way.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has shared:

The good news is that I’ve been finding new ways to waste my time.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has viewed:

You know you’re mature when you go to the dentist and you are no longer afraid of pain, but of how much it costs.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has bookmarked:

If it was really a smart phone, it would have recognize that it was an ignored call, not missed.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has downloaded:

I need to hire someone to just constantly slap food out of my hand.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has copied:

Maybe dogs are smarter than us because they found a way to get fed and housed without having to go to college and get a job.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has downloaded:

After my funeral, I want one of my friends to take my phone and text everyone, “Thanks for coming.”

Someone from 🇨🇿 has shared:

Everything’s under control. I just don’t know whose.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has viewed:

The tragedy of my life is that I theoretically know when I shouldn’t say anything. And then I hear myself talking.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has downloaded:

I’ve never met a cake I didn’t want to fork.

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

Not a gold digger, but the other night a woman told me her grandpa owns a Christmas tree farm. That shit had me rubbing my hands like a fly.

Making waves on Twitch:

I wanted to study psychology, but I have more potential as a patient, to be honest.

Seen just now on Discord:

Pronouncing hyperbole like guacamole.

Freshly posted on X:

Imagine how bored the person who invented mayonnaise must have been.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

“Overdressed” is a social construct created by hating girls.

Making waves on WeChat:

The older I get, the more I realize being in a hurry is a terrible way to live your life.

Live now on YouTube:

I like to take long walks away from stupid people.

Freshly posted on X:

Imagine being social on social media.

Going viral on WeChat:

I get tired from just thinking of everything I have to do.

Going bananas on TikTok:

It actually is crazy how many people I know would benefit from being visited by three ghosts.

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