87 Funny wanted quotes

• I appreciate all clouds. Fluffy, non-fluffy… it’s how Bob Ross would’ve wanted it.

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  5 hours ago

  appreciate, appreciation, Bob, Bob Ross, cloud, clouds, fluff, fluffy, humor, i, ross, wanted

• “I’ve never met a medical receptionist that I believed wanted me to live.”

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  6 hours ago

  healthcare, humor, i, interaction, live, me, medical, medical receptionist, met, never, patient, patient interaction, receptionist, sarcasm, wanted

• Ever since I was young, I wanted to check my email for a verification code.

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  13 hours ago

  check, childhood, code, digital, digital life, email, ever, humor, i, life, online, online security, security, technology, verification, verification code, wanted, young

• Rental car companies seem so insanely helpless at their one job. You show up at the airport, reservation in hand, and they’re like, ‘Wait, really? You wanted a car? Sorry, you totally caught me off guard.’

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  17 hours ago

  airport, car, caught, company, customer, customer service, frustration, guard, hand, humor, job, me, rental, rental car, rental company, reservation, sarcasm, service, show, sorry, wait, wanted

• I wanted to wear some hot lingerie, but didn’t have any, so I put on this red dental floss.

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  1 day ago

  clothing, dental, dental floss, fashion, floss, hot, humor, i, joke, lingerie, put, red, wanted, wear

• I don’t believe the phrase “if they wanted to, they would,” because I want to, and I don’t.

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  1 day ago

  attitude, believe, desire, honesty, humor, i, motivation, phrase, truth, want, wanted, willpower

• I exaggerated on my job application and said I wanted to work for a living.

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  1 day ago

  application, employment, exaggerated, exaggeration, humor, i, job, job application, living, motivation, said, wanted, work

• I slept for 11 hours last night, just wanted everyone with kids to know that.

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  2 weeks ago

  everyone, exhaustion, hours, humor, i, just, kid, kids, know, last, night, parent, rest, sleep, wanted

• My boss denied me a raise before my shift today. What’s some music you have never wanted to hear in a coffee shop?

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  3 weeks ago

  before, boss, coffee, coffee shop, complaint, denied, hear, humor, me, music, never, raise, shift, shop, today, wanted, work

• If you ever wanted to know anything about me, just get me a bottle of wine, and you will, in fact, find out in about 10 minutes.

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  3 weeks ago

  anything, bottle, drinking, ever, fact, humor, just, know, me, minutes, personal, socializing, wanted, wine

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