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101 Funny idea quotes

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5 months ago
Share →: My retirement plan is recording a hit Christmas song. I just need to learn how to sing and write music.

Commentary:
"Looks like someone's banking on their vocal talents to sleigh the retirement game! 🎤🎅 Who needs a 401(k) when you've got jingle bells and high notes to back you up? 🎶😄 #RockinAroundTheRetirementPlan"
5 months ago
Share →: Getting a nose ring, so I don’t lose my keys.

Commentary:
🔑👃 "Forget losing my keys, now I just have to worry about losing my nose ring! Talk about an unconventional keychain 😉 #Priorities"
5 months ago
Share →: Putting a blanket over my boss so he thinks it’s night time and goes to sleep.

Commentary:
"Trying to outsmart your boss with a bedtime trick? 🛌😴 That's some next-level strategizing! Just make sure he doesn't wake up before his alarm goes off!⏰😂"
5 months ago
Share →: Everyone hates on Gollum but he had the right idea: become a hermit, collect jewels, swim naked in lakes and pools, occasionally hiss at people who try to make you go places.

Commentary:
"Who knew Gollum was actually living his best life all along? 😂💍🦎 Just imagine hissing at people who dare disrupt your precious alone time – pure genius! Maybe we should all take notes from the master of solitude and self-care 🏞️🛁 #GollumGoals"
5 months ago
Share →: Idea: An app that tells you where that bruise came from.

Commentary:
"Introducing the 'Bruise Detective' app – for those moments when you wake up with a bruise and can't remember if you're a secret ninja or just clumsy 🕵️‍♂️💥 Mystery solved, one bruise at a time! #BruiseDetective"
5 months ago
Share →: First date idea: Couples Colonoscopies.

Commentary:
"Nothing says 'getting to know you' like comparing polyps! 🎈💑 Who needs candlelit dinners when you can have colonoscopies together? 🕯️💩 #RelationshipGoals 😂"
5 months ago
Share →: Rom-com idea: Gozilla +1. Godzilla gets invited to a wedding but struggles to convince anyone to go with him.

Commentary:
Here's a rom-com idea truly fit for a monster movie makeover: "Gozilla +1"! 🦖👔👰 Picture this – Godzilla receives a wedding invite and decides to brave the human world, but faces the ultimate dilemma: finding a plus one willing to brave the chaos of a monster's love life! Will Godzilla's scales find a spark amidst the tulle and tears, or will the wedding bells just ring for party-crashing? Tune in for a tale of
5 months ago
Share →: The two most popular things to do on the internet are arguing about politics and looking at naked people. Million dollar website idea: combine both — naked people arguing about politics.

Commentary:
"Introducing the ultimate online showdown: Naked Debates! 💻🔥 Watch as passionate individuals bare it all, both emotionally and literally, while engaging in riveting political discussions. Who said politics couldn't be entertaining and revealing at the same time? 💬🔞 #NakedPolitics"
5 months ago
Share →: They should have made a pool raft that looked like a broken door when Titanic was in theaters. I bet it would have sold millions.

Commentary:
"Missed marketing opportunity alert! 🚢💸 Imagine floating on a pool raft that channels your inner Rose Dawson while subtly reminding you of Jack's unfortunate fate. Talk about making a splash with sales! 😆💦 #TitanicPoolRaft #Unsinkable"
5 months ago
Share →: “I thought it might be nice to go around the room and have everyone introduce themselves, including a fun fact.” You thought wrong.

Commentary:
Oh, the dreaded moment when the "fun fact" request strikes fear into the hearts of introverts everywhere! 🙈 Let's be real, nothing brings a group of strangers together quite like the collective eye-rolling that follows this suggestion. 😂 Who knew a simple icebreaker could inspire such levels of panic and creative exaggeration? So, let's spare ourselves the agony and skip right to the good stuff, shall we? 🎉