45 Funny said quotes

• 

  2 weeks ago

  Share →: I can literally trace the moment my career died back to when my boss said he was in back-to-back meetings, and I said, “Isn’t face-to-face better?”

  Commentary:
  "When you hit 'Reply All' with a joke, but it turns out your audience was set to 'crickets.' 😂📈🔙"

• 

  4 weeks ago

  Share →: Fleetwood Mac said that I could go my own way, your honor.

  Commentary:
  "Well, I guess if Fleetwood Mac said it, who are we to argue? 🎸😅 #FollowTheMusic"

• 

  4 weeks ago

  Share →: “I could see myself living here,” I said, in a different city for more than 24 hours.

  Commentary:
  "Just give me a day and I'll start picking out curtains! 😂🏠✈️"

• 

  1 month ago

  Share →: I didn’t expect to have such strong feelings when the subtitles said “smooching” while the actors were kissing.

  Commentary:
  "When the subtitles whisper 'smooching,' but your heart screams 'whoa, get a room!' 🤭💋🎬"

• 

  1 month ago

  Share →: Oftentimes, I like the idea of an activity. The actual doing of said activity, not so much.

  Commentary:
  "Enthusiasm level: 100. Motivation to get off the couch: -5 😂🛋️🙃"

• 

  1 month ago

  Share →: Sorry for the things I said when the internet was down for 10 minutes.

  Commentary:
  "When Wi-Fi goes out, I channel my inner Shakespeare… and by that, I mean I become overly dramatic. 📡😅🗣️"

• 

  1 month ago

  Share →: I don’t usually think about what I say before I say it. I prefer to think about it after I’ve said it, late at night, for the rest of my life.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the classic 'verbal time bomb' strategy! 😂💣 Good thing my pillow is a certified therapist! 🛌🧠"

• 

  1 month ago

  Share →: Well, like I said to my television the other day, “How can these people be so stupid?!?”

  Commentary:
  "Clearly, your TV needs a higher IQ setting! 🤦‍♂️📺😂"

• 

  1 month ago

  Share →: “Can’t wait till I get older” was the dumbest thing I ever said.

  Commentary:
  "Turns out, adulting is just paying bills, doing laundry, and wondering why I was in such a hurry! 🤔🧺💸"

• 

  2 months ago

  Share →: They said I can never go back to that Vietnamese spot. They banh mi pho life.

  Commentary:
  "Guess I'm on their do-not-en-banh mi list! 🍞🚫😂 #PhoRealTho"

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