154 Funny something quotes

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  4 months ago

  Share →: I don’t flirt, I just say weird things and hope something sticks.

  Commentary:
  "Flirting level: Expert in awkwardness 🤪 Who needs pickup lines when you've got a collection of bizarre statements? Just throwing spaghetti at the wall and seeing what sticks! 🍝😅 #AwkwardlyCharming"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Going to hack Kanye’s account and make him post something normal.

  Commentary:
  "Plot twist: Kanye's definition of 'normal' might just break the internet… 🤯💻 #KanyeGoneMild"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Menstruation is bizarre. It’s like something David Lynch would have came up with.

  Commentary:
  "Menstruation: the totally Lynchian experience where your body decides to host its very own Twin Peaks marathon every month! 🩸🕰️🦉 #StrangeButTrue"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: I bet doom scroll meant something way cooler in the middle ages.

  Commentary:
  "Oh, the irony of doom scrolling in the age of knights and dragons! 🐉📜 I can almost picture a medieval town crier announcing, 'Hear ye, hear ye! Prepare thyselves for the impending doom scroll!' 🗡️📱 #MedievalProblems"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: There’s something fundamentally wrong with the way people interact with each other on LinkedIn.

  Commentary:
  Oh LinkedIn, the land of humblebrags and strategic networking 🤝! It's like a virtual corporate cocktail party where everyone's trying to out-professional each other. Maybe we should add a 'Likes to make puns' skill to our profiles to lighten the mood 😄. Just remember, on LinkedIn, we all strive to be LinkedInfluencers! #ProfessionalJokesOnly 🤓👔

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  5 months ago

  Share →: I hate it when someone gives me a valid solution to my problem and I have to find something new to complain about.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the never-ending struggle of being a professional complainer! 😂 It's like a full-time job to stay discontented, isn't it? 🙄 Who knew finding new grievances could be so exhausting! 😅 #FirstWorldProblems"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Oligarchy sounds like something you dip your breadstick in at the olive garden.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the elusive Oligarchy sauce—the perfect pairing for your breadstick-dipping adventures at Olive Garden! 🍞🥫 Just be careful, too much Oligarchy might lead to an unexpected hierarchy of breadstick hoarders at your table! 😂 #BreadstickMonarchy"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: I need something good to watch while I’m on my phone.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the eternal struggle of our digital age – multitasking entertainment connoisseur! 📺📱 Who knew finding the perfect show could be as challenging as balancing a plate of spaghetti on a unicycle? 🍝🤹‍♂️"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Old Spice doesn’t sound like something you wanna smell.

  Commentary:
  "Old Spice: when you want to smell like a rugged lumberjack but end up smelling like your grandpa's basement 😂🌲 #NotSoSpicy"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Grok just sounds like something that might try to eat me.

  Commentary:
  Absolutely! 🤣 It's no surprise that Grok gives off those "I might eat you" vibes. 🍴 Maybe Grok just needs a hug… or maybe a snack. Watch out for that one! 🦖 #GrokTheHungry

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