Funny quotes start Page 2

99 Funny start quotes

Hey, you should start your own business and then mind it.

Funny Quotes Jan 28, 2025

I start each day assuming it will be horrible and go from there.

Funny Quotes Jan 28, 2025

Don’t flirt with me. I’ll show up at your house and start eating all your snacks.

Funny Quotes Jan 28, 2025

If we start dating now, we could be feeding each other deviled eggs on Thanksgiving, and breaking up before we have to exchange gifts for Christmas.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025

If I text you an accordion emoji, it means you better start acting accordingly.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025

I might start telling people I’m 10 years older than I actually am just so they can tell me how great I look for my age.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025

Start every phone call with “My battery is at 5%” so you can hang up whenever you want.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025

I’m not joining no alternate Twitter app. If this gets taken down, I’m starting a family.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025

I ran out of toilet paper so I had to start using old newspapers. The Times are rough.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025

Might start signing off emails with ‘well, I hope you’re happy’

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025

Tip on how best to start a conversation with me: Not at all.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025

I know it’s traditional to start work at 9, but I think we could lower that age to 8.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025

Google Maps should start screaming the more wrong turns you make.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025

The human brain is great. It works from the second you are born and stops as soon as you start liking someone.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025

Some people can start a task and then just finish it instead of trying to do a hundred things at once, like a squirrel on crack.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025

Two bros having a conversation in the 1700s like “omg, we should totally start a pamphlet”

Funny Quotes Jan 26, 2025

Airport security asked me if I’ve seen anything unusual. I just paid $18 for a coke & a sandwich. Let’s start with that.

Funny Quotes Jan 26, 2025

Netflix needs to stop asking if I’m still watching and start asking if I moved the laundry to the dryer yet.

Funny Quotes Jan 26, 2025

Remember, if you start with, “It’s crazy to think…” you can say whatever you want.

Funny Quotes Jan 26, 2025

Gonna tell my dentist that if I’m late, he should start without me.

Funny Quotes Jan 26, 2025

That moment of panic when they invite you inside at the start of the birthday party you thought was a drop off.

Funny Quotes Jan 26, 2025

Why is the debate at night time? Let’s get this thing started at 4pm. I don’t need to get riled up so close to bedtime.

Funny Quotes Jan 26, 2025

Hate how quietly iPhones die. At 5% it should start verbally begging for its life.

Funny Quotes Jan 26, 2025

The best time to start a family fight is now. It gets you out of buying relatives gifts.

Funny Quotes Jan 26, 2025

My husband said we need to start exercising and get into shape, so I’m going to wake up early tomorrow and start looking for a new husband.

Funny Quotes Jan 26, 2025