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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇦 has viewed:

Yes, I was behind the DJ booth, but only as a cultural anthropologist.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has downloaded:

The longest drum solo was 10 hours and 26 minutes and was performed by the child sitting behind me on a flight from LA to Tokyo.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has viewed:

Who called it a heatwave and not a temperature tantrum?

Someone from 🇳🇿 has downloaded:

Dating outside of your education bracket leads to misunderstandings and arguments.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has bookmarked:

At this point, the only thing that can heal me is memory loss.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has viewed:

We need a holiday at the end of every summer that honours all the women who wore sundresses.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has copied:

Of course I intermittently fast. That’s when I sleep.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has downloaded:

The only thing Flat Earthers have to fear is sphere itself.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has downloaded:

It’s like 10,000 Tupperwares when all you need is a lid.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has shared:

Accept the truth that a clean kitchen and finished laundry are just myths. Embrace the chaos and find your inner calm.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,670

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Slack:

My dog sets an impossible bar for how I should greet my wife when she comes home.

Seen just now on Messenger:

How quickly family vacations go from “Omg, we only have 4 days left” to “Omg, we still have 4 days left”

Broadcasted on Messenger:

You don’t know about stupidity until your female friends open up about their love life.

Seen just now on Threads:

For Halloween, you should be mine.

Going bananas on TikTok:

One of the voices in my head brought up an excellent point, so obviously he had to go.

Making waves on Snapchat:

Can hardly wait until my winter fat turns into spring rolls.

Just landed via Pinterest:

The science between bragging about a man and him disappointing you immediately after needs to be studied.

Spotted on Discord:

I am not the person I thought I was when I cut that donut in half.

Seen just now on X:

Establish dominance at work by drinking iced tea in a wine glass.

Trending via WeChat:

After hearing that I have too many books and too many bookshelves, I’ve decided to cut back on the amount of people I listen to.

176 Funny trying quotes

More funny trying quotes 👇

Just burned 2,000 calories trying to avoid someone I know at Walmart.

1 week ago

activity, avoid, avoiding, avoiding someone, awkwardness, burn, calorie, calorie burn, exercise, exercise humor, funny activity, humor, i, just, know, social, social awkwardness, someone, trying, Walmart
What I’m trying to say is, “Hello, here’s my entire heart and all of my devotion.”

1 week ago

devotion, expression, heart, hello, humor, romantic, say, sentiment, trying
I wish more modern politics were about trying to stop the fulfillment of an ancient prophecy.

1 week ago

ancient, fulfillment, humor, i, modern, politics, prophecy, satire, stop, trying, wish
Hey bartender, can you turn down the music, please? This guy I just met is trying to explain how baseball works.

2 weeks ago

bartender, baseball, explain, guy, humor, i, just, meeting, met, music, please, situation, social, social situation, trying, turn, works
Hey, sorry I acted weird the other day. I was trying so hard to act normal that it backfired.

2 weeks ago

act, apology, awkwardness, backfire, day, hard, humor, i, mishap, normal, self-awareness, social, social mishap, sorry, trying, trying to act normal, weird
I’m already spoiled… please don’t come into my life trying to unspoil me.

2 weeks ago

attitude, humor, life, me, playful, please, sarcasm, self-deprecating, spoiled, trying, unspoiled, witty
Telling your parents about your problems is like trying to put out a fire with gasoline.

2 weeks ago

advice, analogy, fire, frustration, gasoline, humor, parent, parents, problems, put, telling, trying
Mission Impossible theme song plays in my head when I’m trying to remember a password.

2 weeks ago

culture, distraction, effort, head, humor, impossible, memory, mental, mental effort, mission, Mission Impossible, music, password, pop, pop culture, remember, song, theme, theme song, trying
Trying to spend less time on my phone so I can get back to something I’ve loved since childhood: watching TV.

2 weeks ago

activity, back, childhood, distraction, entertainment, fun, fun activity, hobby, i, leisure, less, phone, screen, screen time, something, spend, time, trying, TV, watching
The lion is starting to concern himself with things he’s been trying to ignore.

2 weeks ago

animal, concern, humor, ignore, irony, lion, nature, personality, things, trying

For even more funny trying quotes, hit next 👇

All funny trying quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

85 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Non-alcoholic beer is like a vibrator without batteries: it fills you up nicely but without the buzz…

36 shares on Telegram this month:

Clubbing is a phase that you must go through and get over.

49 shares on Threads this month:

The day they handed out patience, I left because it was taking too long.

78 shares on YouTube this month:

When someone tells me “They could care less”, instead of the proper “I couldn’t care less”, I always say “At least you care.”

87 shares on Discord this month:

I’m not lazy, I’m waiting for inspiration to hit me… should be here any time now.

98 shares on Telegram this month:

I can’t wait til I have hearing aids, so I can just turn them off when I’m tired of hearing everyone.

44 shares on X this month:

I got fired from my job at the massage parlor. No specific reason, apparently I just rub people the wrong way.

33 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Wouldn’t it be nice if you could donate your own body fat to those who need it more urgently?

18 shares on Telegram this month:

Do not take me to an escape room. I was a c-section. Someone is gonna have to come get me.

77 shares on Messenger this month:

I’ll be like “it is what it is” and almost vomit from anxiety.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇳 has downloaded:

I’m so lazy, I let my battles pick me.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has shared:

If you’re partying with your cousin and you’re asked if you’re related, “Our parents are siblings” will cause a lot of confusion.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has viewed:

I have the bruises of a much more active person.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has copied:

If you can’t handle me at my worst, you don’t deserve me at my horniest.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has viewed:

Pretending I’m asleep so my boss has to carry me to the meeting.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has shared:

Why is everyone mean to the kindest people for absolutely no reason?

Someone from 🇧🇯 has viewed:

Working on my harmonica skills so those around me can both hear and feel my depression.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has bookmarked:

The French only eat snails because they don’t like fast food.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has viewed:

Some people should have read-only access to the internet.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has bookmarked:

Wishing I could hit snooze on life’s alarm clock!

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Snapchat:

People my age are raising children, and I’m just here trying to bribe myself with treats into doing my own chores.

Making waves on Instagram:

Hey (threateningly), can I join your years-old, tight-knit, close friend group?

Spotted on Messenger:

Remember the good old days when you didn’t have to wonder if the person messaging you was a bot or not?

Going bananas on X:

Broke my work phone. I can’t talk on it anymore. I should have done this a long time ago.

Just landed via Snapchat:

Dear algorithm, only show this post to the most attractive and successful people.

Going viral on TikTok:

Ever looked at your ex and wondered, was I drunk the entire relationship?

Making waves on Twitch:

Getting mad at your hair is a whole different kind of angry.

Spotted on TikTok:

Adulthood is basically just trying to fall asleep at night and stay awake during the day.

Trending via TikTok:

I just came across my wife’s Tinder profile and I’m so angry about her lies. She is not “fun to be around”.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

Phew, I thought the weather was broken because there was this weird yellow thing in the sky. But all’s well, it’s raining again.

Activity Log ✨

176 Funny trying quotes

More funny trying quotes 👇

All funny trying quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨