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10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇵🇬 has viewed:

“We should get tickets” is as close to a rock concert as I get these days.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has viewed:

One day we will tell our grandkids how far we had to scroll to get to the recipe.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has copied:

Sorry for acting weird. It’s just that I mirror people, and you were being weird first.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has copied:

You’re in her DMs, she’s in my bed whining that it’s too cold. Can you come get her?

Someone from 🇹🇲 has bookmarked:

Spice up your anxiety attack by playing the Jaws theme song.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has bookmarked:

Do you enjoy addiction, anxiety, and urinating? Then coffee may be the beverage for you.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has copied:

Spending all my money on lottery tickets so I’ll either be rich or poor, none of this wishy-washy stuff in the middle.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has shared:

It’s crazy windy today. Trash is blowing everywhere, so watch out for your ex.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has downloaded:

A person’s character can be read quite reliably from the way he or she interacts with service personnel.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has viewed:

So I just googled my symptoms, turns out I’m addicted to you.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1805 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

11,967

Funny Quotes Topics

14,772

Funny Quotes Images

11,967

Updated

3 minutes ago

Users Online

3,450

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Slack:

I finally have glasses, which is great because I needed one more thing to frantically search for every morning.

Shared recently on X:

The only squat I’m even considering doing today is diddly.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Instead of working on making myself a better person, I am going to purchase a cool new jacket.

Seen just now on TikTok:

I am so tired ever my tiredness is tired.

Spotted on Telegram:

Yeah, I have a drinking problem. It’s called dehydration.

Trending via Messenger:

You can’t boss me around. You’re not my bladder.

Going viral on Pinterest:

If biscuits were slimming and contained every nutrient the human body needs, I’d be in terrific shape.

Shared recently on TikTok:

I woke up alive again.

Live now on Telegram:

I look stable, but I talk to animals and wait for them to reply.

Shared recently on Discord:

My whole life just flashed before my eyes and there was way too much pizza.

Home » Funny While Quotes » Page 2

33 Funny while quotes

More funny while quotes 👇

4 days ago
Share →: My husband doesn’t find it nearly as amusing as I do when I sing, “Someday My Prince Will Come,” while I’m cleaning.

Commentary:
Can't blame him, he's cleaning his suit of armor! 🧽🛡️😂
1 week ago
Share →: Coke tastes like tapping into your ancient ancestral petroleum reserves, while Sprite tastes like being connected to a big, beautiful energy grid.

Commentary:
Sounds like Coke is my inner caveman's choice, but Sprite makes me feel like I'm solar-powered! 🌞🦖🔋
1 week ago
Share →: I’m just here trying to spread a little joy while the world burns. Is that so wrong?

Commentary:
Spreading joy like it's confetti and the world is on a BBQ 🍿🔥😄
1 week ago
Share →: I don’t understand people who forget to eat. I’m already planning lunch while chewing breakfast.

Commentary:
Eating is my top skill on LinkedIn 😋🥐📅
2 weeks ago
Share →: I haven’t posted a selfie in a while, but I’m still very cute. Just to keep you updated.

Commentary:
Still "selfie-cute," just keeping it under wraps for suspense! 😎📷✨
2 weeks ago
Share →: Biting your tongue while eating is a perfect example of how you can still screw up, even with decades of experience.

Commentary:
Even after all these years, my tongue and teeth still aren't on speaking terms! 🍽️🤦‍♂️🤣
2 weeks ago
Share →: Death doesn’t scare me, but a group of dogs fighting while I’m walking alone on the street does.

Commentary:
Paws before you scare! 😅🐶🚶‍♂️🛑
2 weeks ago
Share →: Not to brag or anything, but I can forget what I’m doing while I’m doing it.

Commentary:
Sounds like you’re living life on shuffle mode! 🤔🔀😂
2 weeks ago
Share →: Got electrocuted while fixing the doorbell, and now I can hear my girlfriend’s thoughts. She’s thinking she should have called an electrician.

Commentary:
Now I'm not just shocked by the doorbell but also by how much my girlfriend wanted a professional. 🔌😜🔊🤯
2 weeks ago
Share →: It’s important to get out of the house every once and a while to remind yourself of why you don’t go out.

Commentary:
Stepped outside, instantly missed my couch! 😂🏡 #HomeSweetHome

For even more funny while quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny while quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

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Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇹 has bookmarked:

I get so embarrassed for no reason after posting on social media, like, why am I showing my life?

Someone from 🇹🇬 has copied:

I thought my wrinkles were finally getting smaller, but it turns out my eyes were just getting worse.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has copied:

Spewing nonsense online is the most fun a depressed person is allowed to have in these twisted times.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has viewed:

You should get one IG story in addition to your one phone call when you’re arrested.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has shared:

Being on Twitter right now is like playing the violin on the Titanic, except we are also making fun of the iceberg and the iceberg is getting genuinely mad.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has bookmarked:

Showers are the best places to lose arguments with yourself.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has shared:

When does hibernation actually begin? I wanna take part this year.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has downloaded:

I’ve been on Facebook for so long, I remember when it all used to be farmland.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has downloaded:

We can do things one of two ways. My way or my other way.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has viewed:

This generation of men makes celibacy so easy for women.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

Anti-capitalism is just code for “I don’t know how anything works.”

Just shared via Twitch:

“Those tattoos will make it harder to get a job!” Okay, well so will my personality.

Live now on WhatsApp:

Me, gently telling my kids that I ate the rest of the ice cream: Your dad ate the rest of the ice cream.

Trending via WhatsApp:

I take offense when people don’t invite me to events l’d like to turn down.

Spotted on Threads:

My doctor told me to try a milk bath. Adding the Cinnamon Toast Crunch was my idea.

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

This is my phone. I text back when I want to.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

I hate it when I’m singing a song and the artist gets the words wrong.

Broadcasted on TikTok:

My kids acting shocked there’s ants in my car like they’re not Hansel and Gretel leaving bloody crumb trails.

Broadcasted on YouTube:

Next time someone says “I’m a hugger” and tries to hug me I’m gonna say “I’m a biter” and see how it goes.

Going viral on Discord:

Rock bottom should give me free sandwich and coffee for how often I hit it.

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Activity Log ✨

33 Funny while quotes

More funny while quotes 👇

For even more funny while quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny while quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

It’s freaking me out to think of how bad I’d look at the Met Gala.

I’m going to a karaoke bar tomorrow, where I’ll sing every song in the style of Yoko Ono.

Currently helping my kids find the chocolate that I ate last night.

I don’t dress for women. I don’t dress for men. I dress for the weather, mainly.

I suspect that you don’t lose weight during sport because of the exercise, but because you can’t eat anything during this time.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

I love traveling because I love to check if I have my passport every 3-4 minutes.

I know I just ate a snack, but I could really use a snack.

Have you noticed? When the relationship is new, the guy is never busy.

If I ever become a ghost, I’m gonna go back and haunt college me. Tell him to hydrate.

Please don’t ask me about my dream job. I would never work in my dreams.

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

I told my suitcase we wouldn’t be going on vacation this year; now it’s dead inside and I’m left with emotional baggage.

I don’t think I’ve ever made the right amount of pasta.

Women are like apples; I like biting them.

Every day when I get home, I thank my cats for allowing me to live in their house.

Seeing people exercising outside my house really motivated me to get up and close the blinds.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

No one my age is single because they’re all unhappily married.

Parenting sometimes feels like you’re an elevator. Lots of ups and downs and the kids love to push your buttons.

So I just googled my symptoms, turns out I’m addicted to you.

Apparently I lack empathy, according to some stupid cow in HR.

They say every snowflake is different, as if someone actually checked them.

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