Funny quotes watch

74 Funny watch quotes

Every time I watch “The Godfather”, I notice some new detail (they’re Italian???).

4 weeks ago

TikTok? I still call it a watch.

1 month ago

How many calories does an audible sigh burn? Because I don’t think my Apple Watch is giving me credit for them.

1 month ago

Instead of cleaning my house, I just watch episodes of hoarders on TV and then I think “Wow, my house looks awesome!”

1 month ago

My doctor told me to watch my drinking. Now I drink in front of a mirror.

1 month ago

Women watch Netflix with subtitles because they don’t know how to listen.

1 month ago

I be skipping everyone’s stories but watch mine like 20 times.

1 month ago

I don’t need a fancy watch to tell me I’m not fit one bit.

1 month ago

Watching as gravity slowly unfriends you.

1 month ago

Pool rules: You’re not allowed to do anything that begins with the words ‘Hey everyone watch this!’

1 month ago

Husband said he only wants to allow our kids to watch Looney Tunes and nothing else because of the “moral lessons”.

1 month ago

Unfortunately, the movie you want to watch is unavailable on your 13 streaming services. You can rent it for $2.99 though.

2 months ago

Who else here can say that they have NEVER watched any of the Kardashian shows?

2 months ago

No one watches your story faster than someone who doesn’t talk to you.

2 months ago

Threatening my husband with tariffs every time he tries to make me watch sports on TV.

2 months ago

I need something good to watch while I’m on my phone.

3 months ago

It’s crazy windy today. Trash is blowing everywhere, so watch out for your ex.

3 months ago

Netflix has every movie except the one you want to watch.

3 months ago

I just can’t watch football, there’s too much “penetration in the backfield” for me to not giggle like an immature maniac.

3 months ago

have one of those big paintings with the eyeholes cut out, but I don’t have anyone to spy on, so I just watch TV through it.

3 months ago