Wordgag 🎅

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇳 has bookmarked:

Me driving at night: I hope this is the road!

Someone from 🇺🇦 has bookmarked:

The real challenge of adulthood is figuring out what to eat every day.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has shared:

Have you tried complaining about it?

Someone from 🇹🇭 has shared:

Would have started saving money in kindergarten if I knew my life was like this.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has shared:

Can you delete that photo of me? It looks exactly the way I look in real life.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has shared:

I brake for no one, except squirrels.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has shared:

I’m heading to the beach without a beach body.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has viewed:

The worst thing is finding out the “sweet guy” is just a lustful loser.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has copied:

Grape soda doesn’t taste at all like grapes, but it does taste like purple, and I don’t know how to explain that.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has bookmarked:

I don’t understand the desire to rock climb. We have stairs for that now. Problem solved.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

501 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,094

Funny Quotes Topics

17,246

Funny Quotes Images

15,094

Updated

Dec 22, 2025

Users Online

3,864

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Threads:

Messages are way funnier when you know how that person talks.

Going viral on Reddit:

Nudes are outdated. Send me a video of you reading out loud so I know you’re not dumb.

Seen just now on WeChat:

My soul leaving my body when the lecturer says “let’s hear from someone who hasn’t spoken yet”

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

In these difficult times, it’s important to remember that cheese exists.

Freshly posted on Discord:

I can’t wait to retire so I can get up at 6 a.m. and go drive around really slow and make everybody late for work.

Just shared via Slack:

If you look close enough, everyone is insane.

Shared recently on Slack:

I don’t understand people who do things on weekends. You just did things all week. What’s next, more things? That’s how they get you.

Seen just now on Discord:

I thought Game of Thrones was a pooping contest for men.

Breaking via WeChat:

Age ceases to be just a number everytime the airline announces seating queue priority.

Seen just now on WeChat:

My grandmother is a shining example of how you can live until 90 years of age, sustained by nothing but spite and biscuits.

More funny quotes 👇

Just got diagnosed with needing a hot chocolate with extra marshmallows.

0

1 week ago

beverage, chocolate, comfort, comfort food, craving, diagnosis, extra, food, got, hot, hot chocolate, humor, just, marshmallow
The best part about NYC is you literally see a brand new, hottest woman in your entire life every single day.

0

1 week ago

attraction, best, brand, city, city life, daily, daily life, dating, day, every, hot, hot woman, hottest, humor, life, literally, new, NYC, single, woman
Wild Friday night, and by wild, I mean me and the other psychopaths at the gym.

0

1 week ago

Friday, Friday night, gym, humor, i, me, mean, night, psychopath, wild, wild night, workout
90% of debugging is just realizing your own stupidity in slow motion.

0

1 week ago

90, debugging, humor, just, motion, own, programming, realization, slow, slow motion, stupidity
Everyone loves a little silent treatment on the weekend.

0

1 week ago

communication, everyone, humor, little, relationship, sarcasm, silent, silent treatment, treatment, weekend
The fact Head and Shoulders doesn’t have a body wash called Knees and Toes, is disappointing.

0

1 week ago

body, body wash, brand, called, disappointment, fact, head, Head and Shoulders, humor, hygiene, idea, knees, product, product idea, shampoo, shoulders, t, wash
There should be bloopers at the end of horror films to relax the viewer before sleeping.

0

1 week ago

before, bloopers, credits, end, end credits, film, films, horror, horror film, movie, relax, should, sleep, sleeping, viewer
My skin has so much oil, I’m surprised countries aren’t fighting over who controls it.

0

1 week ago

conflict, control, country, exaggeration, fight, fighting, humor, joke, much, oil, over, skin
If I walk into a girl’s house and she got like 50 plants, I know she’s a keeper because she already takes care of a bunch of useless things. What’s one more?

0

1 week ago

50, care, caretaker, girl, girls, got, house, humor, i, keeper, know, pet, plants, relationship, responsibility, things, useless, walk
Is it just my dad, or do all fathers watch videos on their phones with the volume full blast, with no concern for anyone else in the house?

0

1 week ago

anyone, blast, concern, dad, distraction, else, family, father, full, habit, house, humor, just, loud, phone, phones, video, videos, volume, watch

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎁🎅🎄 Christmas Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

81 shares on Instagram this month:

It’s really sad that April Fools is the only day people are appropriately skeptical of stuff they read on the internet.

23 shares on Instagram this month:

Every time I see a couple riding a tandem bike, I try to figure out which one of them is pissed about it.

47 shares on Messenger this month:

Can’t sleep because I keep finding exciting opportunities to get pissed off.

28 shares on Instagram this month:

Never cry at the weekend. Cry at work, at least then you’ll get paid for it.

59 shares on Pinterest this month:

I have a question and my question is, how can I look so cute in the mirror but like such a baked potato in pictures?

22 shares on Discord this month:

You can’t have everything… where would you put it?”

30 shares on Twitch this month:

Giving all the dogs in my neighborhood matching sweaters for Christmas so they can be in a gang.

41 shares on YouTube this month:

Stop worrying about being weird and start being weirder.

40 shares on Discord this month:

My Mom say that everyone has a beautiful side, so I guess I’m a circle.

78 shares on Reddit this month:

And so ends another week without me getting rich unexpectedly.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇩 has bookmarked:

The length of a LinkedIn Post is directly proportional to the amount of bullshit in it.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has shared:

I just refuse to take a single bite of my food until I find something good to watch.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has viewed:

I once made the irresponsible decision to drink and drive and now I have to live the rest of my days with a coffee stain on my favorite sweater.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has downloaded:

Sleep well, middle finger—you’ve got a big day ahead of you tomorrow.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has shared:

Ctrl Alt delete my fat.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has bookmarked:

If you hide the Easter eggs while you’re drunk, nobody knows where they are.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has downloaded:

I don’t need to learn something new, I need to remember something old, like why did I come into this room?

Someone from 🇮🇳 has bookmarked:

You know shit’s about to get real when I put on yoga pants before dessert.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has bookmarked:

My issue with Jeopardy is that you never get the sense that the contestants are in any real danger.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has bookmarked:

Some people buy shoes to feel alive. I buy boarding passes.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on YouTube:

How is a plant not able to handle direct sunlight? You’re from outside.

Trending via Discord:

Plot twist: weed is addicted to me.

Just shared via WeChat:

Why did they call it an Amazon wishlist and not an ‘Oughttobuyography’.

Broadcasted on Messenger:

I don’t understand people who say “I don’t know how to thank you.” Like they never heard of money.

Just shared via Messenger:

Babe, are you okay? You’ve barely touched your unread books.

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

Someone asked me how much I spend on a bottle of wine. 30 minutes was not the right answer.

Shared recently on Discord:

My parents didn’t raise me to be rude, I had to practice.

Trending via Twitch:

Dudes get a MacBook, and all of a sudden, they got work to do in public places.

Seen just now on Threads:

I start off my mornings with coffee and low expectations.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

Me, gently telling my kids that I ate the rest of the ice cream: Your dad ate the rest of the ice cream.

Activity Log ✨

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨